Read on Twitter
"Die to yourself." They taught that in the church so fiercely.
I guess I should have expected remnants of that message to carry over for those navigating the roads of #Exvangelical life, but it has been hard to watch.
Too much time in Twitter-land can't help, either.
1/12
I guess I should have expected remnants of that message to carry over for those navigating the roads of #Exvangelical life, but it has been hard to watch.
Too much time in Twitter-land can't help, either.
1/12
The ridiculous standard of expecting perfection and having zero tolerance for humans to behave like humans (especially in conflict) definitely makes sense through this lense, and it's helping me understand the drama in our post-religious community.
I'm still sad, though.
2/12
I'm still sad, though.
2/12
It's still hard to see people leading this movement who are trapped in this mindset.
"Die to yourself! Sit down, and shut up even though people are accusing you of things that are not true, even though they are using language that is SO unfair and extreme and damaging."
3/12
"Die to yourself! Sit down, and shut up even though people are accusing you of things that are not true, even though they are using language that is SO unfair and extreme and damaging."
3/12
"Die to yourself! Don't you dare defend your character, even though this word being attached to you has FAR-REACHING consequences. You have to shut up anyway. Sit down!â
That's an impossible expectation for humans, but I see that expectation is common here.
4/12
That's an impossible expectation for humans, but I see that expectation is common here.
4/12
"For the greater good!"
We are easily convinced that the sacrifice of THIS ONE HUMAN will be worth it because the masses will benefit! (Literally...The story of Jesus.)
I have seen many carry that over in this place.
Sure, lessons ARE learned this way, but best practice? No.
We are easily convinced that the sacrifice of THIS ONE HUMAN will be worth it because the masses will benefit! (Literally...The story of Jesus.)
I have seen many carry that over in this place.
Sure, lessons ARE learned this way, but best practice? No.
It's just the best the church came up with, so it makes me sad to see so many in this MUCH BETTER world (that I finally found!) continue that nonsense.
I still see the humanity in those who are choosing this strategy, though. Breaking free from this stuff is hard.
6/12
I still see the humanity in those who are choosing this strategy, though. Breaking free from this stuff is hard.
6/12
But I hope we can.
Because other lessons (the super toxic ones that we learned in the church) are being perpetuated in this bullshit, too.
I remember them: my parents, my pastors, the church...Expecting me to handle my reactions, my emotions, my feelings... PERFECTLY.
7/12
Because other lessons (the super toxic ones that we learned in the church) are being perpetuated in this bullshit, too.
I remember them: my parents, my pastors, the church...Expecting me to handle my reactions, my emotions, my feelings... PERFECTLY.
7/12
When people do not, the church suddenly has ammunition, and WOW, do they use it.
Pastors often needed to hang the sins of their congregants as banners from their pulpits because those sermons packed a better punch.
That pattern is here in the #Exvangelical community, too.
8/12
Pastors often needed to hang the sins of their congregants as banners from their pulpits because those sermons packed a better punch.
That pattern is here in the #Exvangelical community, too.
8/12
It makes me sad, but as I said when I started this thread, I'm realizing I should have expected it.
Because we, the survivors of fundamentalist religions, learned some toxic shit.
The people leading our cause, did too, and this stuff is HARD to recognize and unlearn.
9/12
Because we, the survivors of fundamentalist religions, learned some toxic shit.
The people leading our cause, did too, and this stuff is HARD to recognize and unlearn.
9/12
That's my own personal lesson in all of this.
I blindly trusted the leaders in my church, and that was a HUGE mistake.
My indoctrination led me to similar trust here. (Because I'm a fucking idealist!) But that sort of trust is equally problematic outside of the church.
10/12
I blindly trusted the leaders in my church, and that was a HUGE mistake.
My indoctrination led me to similar trust here. (Because I'm a fucking idealist!) But that sort of trust is equally problematic outside of the church.
10/12
We are all human, after all.
We aren't perfect.
We can never BE perfect. (Unlike those ridiculous expectations my church convinced me were real...)
But we are trying.
#DevoutlyHuman
11/12
We aren't perfect.
We can never BE perfect. (Unlike those ridiculous expectations my church convinced me were real...)
But we are trying.
#DevoutlyHuman
11/12
And even though I'm sad and angry and banging my head at these patterns I keep seeing in #Exvangelical Twitter-land, I'm glad we are all trying.
And I'm glad all of us can keep learning because there is still so much to learn... even as we LEAD the work to #EmptyThePews.
12/12
And I'm glad all of us can keep learning because there is still so much to learn... even as we LEAD the work to #EmptyThePews.
12/12
