Thread by @princessk1997, Why I identify as bi/pan but seem to only ever feel the [...]

Why I identify as bi/pan but seem to only ever feel the desire to be romantically involved with men: a thread.

To clear things up I find all genders attractive and honestly haven’t met many non-binary folk in my life! So for personal reasons I will be mostly referring to men and/or women in this thread, however non-binary is valid and beautiful.

The reason I will be using the terms men and women are because all of the interactions I will be referring to have been with men or women and not nb people.

OKAY LETS BEGIN.
I always had interest in more stereotypically “female” activities (keep in mind I’m born in ‘97 so I grew up in a very “gendered” society) so most of my friends were female in my early school years. Now, I don’t know about anyone else, but I personally felt-

like the girls were a lot more selective with their friends than the boys. Girls were often ostracized by other girls, whereas the boys all seemed to get along fine.

Throughout my early school years I had a very difficult time sustaining friendships with the girls; they were very petty and judgmental and were just flat out nasty at times. The boys were often inclusive and friendly towards me.

I’m aware that I’m not conventionally “pretty” and I’m aware that I’m overweight. But I’m mostly aware of that because of things other women have said or done to shame me. I have never had a man tell me I’m ugly or overweight (unless it was in response to me declining their-

offers of carnal relations. Which is a whole other breed of nasty that I don’t enjoy either but hey, there’s always gonna be nasty people no matter what gender you’re attracted to)

The boys/men I have interacted with in my life have generally treated me like they would treat any other person. The girls/women however have ranged from being super supportive and friendly to being NASTY B*TCHES. And from what I gather their reasoning behind treating me-

sub-human was out of jealousy or just generally thinking I was unworthy of being in their life for some unexplainable reason which I have only ever equated to either my weight or my appearance (ie not being super pretty)

Some random points that I don’t feel like typing huge explanations for:
-all girls do is gossip. Literally ALL THEY TALK ABOUT. IS. GOSSIP.
-boys talk about literally anything and everything and just generally have more interesting conversations.
-girls constantly make me feel-

inferior or sub-human or unworthy of their friendship.
-girls will talk about you behind your back and then act sweet to your face
-boys are pretty straight up and honest about their opinions

The women in my life have made me more self conscious about my weight and appearance than any man ever has.

For YEARS I was so scared that no boy would ever want to have s*x with me SOLELY BASED ON THE FACT THAT THE WOMEN IN MY LIFE MADE ME FEEL LIKE I WASNT ATTRACTIVE AND THAT IS SO F*CKED.

In conclusion, everyone has different experiences and different takes on things, so please don’t @ me with your sob story of how men have mistreated you, I personally have experienced way more judgment and shaming from other women than I ever have from any man I’ve ever met.

while some women are out here with their pepper spray, terrified of being physically/sexually assaulted by men, I am out here avoiding having women as friends because I’m terrified of the emotional termoil they might put me through.

I just really have no desire to be in a romantic relationship with someone who is included in the group of people who have mistreated me the most in my life.

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