In the past few days I've seen a lot of people sharing stories of abuse, but one thing I see highlighted the most was how systems of power kept the abusers safe. I have my own story that happened in High School, and since he was part of the Football team, I didn't report it.

I knew that if I did, I would be targeted. I eventually had a tall friend escort me around so he couldn't corner me. Then I just switched to community college classes. But the one thing I think about is how the experience influenced me getting into counseling, to help others.

I used to have this view that trauma made me a kinder person, but that's wrong. I was a kind person all along, and trauma was something awful that happened to me, and I'm proud that it didn't turn me into something awful, at least not in the long run. But it did leave scars.

It's important to not glorify trauma as this force that creates kindness. It can create empathy, but it is your own growth that should be highlighted, and the systems that allow abuse that need to be destroyed, not normalized, permitted, belittled, or apologized for.

I think the most surreal thing is when I talk about it as an adult. People want to hug me. They tell me they're so sorry, and that they would have stopped it. But the reality was, nobody did. It's a systemic problem. That's where it needs to be stopped.