I see that my abuser @astronautalis has decided to ignore the very specific, very intentional guidance of @AnarchyAndi & come out with a statement before reaching out to all of his very many victims.

I want it to be known that when @astronautalis called @AnarchyAndi looking for me—which he had to do because I had blocked him 3 years ago—not 4—he sent her this statement & asked for her advice.

Her advice was to not publish it & to listen to his MANY victims first.

I see that in this statement that he was told not to put out, he decided he could not only talk about me, but describe how I have less light now because of him.

Let me be clear.

I have not been dulled.

I. Am. On. Fire.

I am on fire because of all of the survivors who have reached out to me, offering THEIR support, despite how triggering this has been for all of us.

In this time when we are trying to abolish the police, when we are fighting to dismantle the carceral state & white supremacy, survivors have been asking for restorative justice.

SURVIVORS have been giving very clear, very specific directions to our abusers, & it is failing because THEY won’t listen. Because we don’t matter to them. Not really. If we did, they would follow our guidance. If we did, they wouldn’t have hurt us in the first place.

& the performance of this apology from @astronautalis. He couldnt wait 24 hrs before putting it out for me to process if I wanted to give him space to apologize. Instead, he forced me to see this apology in public.

Once again he has taken my agency from me. This too is violence

I hope you see from this thread that his apology is not about me. None of it has been. It is still about saving face in front of all of you.