hetero marriages have only survived because society has made women believe being partnered is more valuable than anything else. and her survival and worth as a person are at stake if she isnt partnered.

If you can call into question a womans worth by her perceived desirability to men and ability to stay partnered, you can control and manipulate her into entering partnerships that otherwise dont serve her for the sake of saving her own image.

basically women are conned into signing up for even more labor AND thinking that its actually what they should want and aspire to.

and men are able to skate by being the absolute worse version of themselves because they know at the end of the day someone will be forced to want to partner with them. so they use it to their advantage and hold their commitment hostage to get what they want out of women

thats why so many men lead with their willingness to be or not to be partnered because they know at the end of the day thats what matters most and thats their biggest tool to manipulate women.

its sad too because men truly dont see the problem with how they treat women. and because of misogyny they can always flip it and be like “why do you allow such treatment?” instead of ever calling into question their own behavior.

they dont set any sort of baseline moral standard for themselves. they will go as low as possible because they are taught to take advantage of others and when caught to use different manipulation tactics to ever avoid looking at themselves or changing.

but deep down like all privileged groups. they know their inadequacies and are highly self conscious. they know they are not enough as people so they cling to the one thing that they have that is still valuable. their partnership.

they cant provide financial or emotional support so they cling to this last leg of hoping someone is desperate enough to marry them. and continuously show up as the worst version of themselves because they have no moral standing outside of doing the most they can get away

its sad really because they end up cheating themselves, their family and others. but i dont feel bad because every day men can actively choose to do and be better and they dont. because misogyny is a way to skate with doing the bare minimum and still being what women aspire to