Read on Twitter
Hey there. It& #39;s been awhile. I didn& #39;t think I& #39;d be here again, honestly.
While I tell you where I& #39;ve been and what& #39;s changed, feel free to go "AH CRAP I DIDN& #39;T THINK SHE& #39;D BE BACK" and unfollow me or whatever. Do your thing. I won& #39;t mind.
While I tell you where I& #39;ve been and what& #39;s changed, feel free to go "AH CRAP I DIDN& #39;T THINK SHE& #39;D BE BACK" and unfollow me or whatever. Do your thing. I won& #39;t mind.
Where I& #39;ve been involves a trigger warning for suicidal ideation.
I had a breakdown right after I left twitter. I almost killed myself. I drove myself to the hospital instead. It was 100% the worst time in my entire adult life. I& #39;ve spent every day since getting better.
I had a breakdown right after I left twitter. I almost killed myself. I drove myself to the hospital instead. It was 100% the worst time in my entire adult life. I& #39;ve spent every day since getting better.
I never thought I could get so low. But I did. I won& #39;t again. I won& #39;t for me & I won& #39;t for my wife & I won& #39;t for my kids. I& #39;ve been in intensive therapy, have a diagnosis of trauma, and it& #39;s early days, but I& #39;ve had some big breakthroughs. It& #39;s been a buildup from a breakdown.
So, here are a few things that are changing:
I will focus on having positive interactions on this platform. Having been the focus of negativity to the point where it nearly killed me, I won& #39;t do that to someone else. It& #39;s not in line with my values and it causes too much pain.
I will focus on having positive interactions on this platform. Having been the focus of negativity to the point where it nearly killed me, I won& #39;t do that to someone else. It& #39;s not in line with my values and it causes too much pain.
I will not try to make everyone happy because it& #39;s absolutely impossible and was my downfall last time. The LGBTQ community is not a monolith. We won& #39;t all agree. I& #39;m just going to do my thing and if you don& #39;t like it, don& #39;t follow me. I won& #39;t take offence.
That being said, I will own any mistakes on my part with reflection, an apology and a desire to learn. We all mess up, including me. Intentions matter, actions matter, reparations matter. I& #39;m always learning and growing.
I believe in working together because there are enough people trying to tear our community apart. I will always strive for connection, empathy and compassion with others and hope I& #39;m met with that in return. We have a lot of enemies out there. We don& #39;t need to create them.
To protect my mental health, I& #39;ll be unapologetic about setting boundaries for myself. Being an advocate does not make me a punching bag. I will prioritize my well-being and my need to be there for my family before anything else, always. Full stop. Expect nothing else.
If you leave me nasty comments, I won& #39;t reply to them and you might get blocked. You can think whatever you& #39;d like about me. Your opinions of me are 100% your right. But I won& #39;t take responsibility for them and I won& #39;t give them energy. I have bigger things to do. Carry on.
And that& #39;s it. That& #39;s the whole thing. I almost died and I didn& #39;t and now I& #39;m in a significantly better place. I won& #39;t allow any pile-ons to take me down. They don& #39;t carry that power anymore. My self-worth is based on who I am, not who anyone thinks I am. Finally.
And now I& #39;ll let you do what you need to do - get angry, unfollow, send me a welcome back message, screenshot this and talk to people about it... I honestly don& #39;t care anymore. It& #39;s, like, the most freeing thing ever after 43 years of caring way too much.
Love to all.
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Love to all.
