To add something to this thread here:

The question is often asked, "I have to say I'm sorry, don't I, how else will I recieve forgiveness?"

I want to stop you right there. That question by itself centered your apology on how you will benefit in the exchange, not on your victims https://twitter.com/mm_schill/status/1276391151432597504

But, the transactional aspect of that mindset aside, let me address how you can go about recieving forgiveness:

Through action. Through a REPEATED, possibly years long pattern of changed behavior.

I get it! This isn't a satisfying answer for abusers.

Predatory personalities are the way they are because they have BREATHTAKINGLY bad impulse control issues.
Delayed gratification is not their jam!

But, it is literally the only road to real contrition.

And, even then--even if you are a changed person--there is no guarantee anyone will forgive you.

This is a possibility. Accept it.
It is righteous.

Stop centering your apologies on a transactional matrix. You aren't exchanging "I'm sorries" for "it's cool, bros".

Stop trying to wear us down with "I'm sorries" until you get what you want, in the same way you wear down women for unwanted sexual contact.

Start centering your apologies on making your victims whole, even if part of that requires you to be made broken.

Give us our pound of flesh.

...or at least pull your seat at the table out, as you leave to consider your wrongs, so WE can have that seat. The seat you've helped keep from us...at a table we helped to build.

Be a gentleman. Pull the seat out.