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I am feeling like crap, possibly the fucking rona. I'm sure I'll live. But since I've got a lot of time on my hands, I want to talk about narcissists. I don't know who might need to hear this rn. If you can't deal, please mute the thread.
I've had some close life experiences with narcs. Trust me, with this current kerfuffle, they have already scented blood in the water and are now trying to make this about them. It's got everything a narc needs: drama, sympathetic ppl who call em brave, shitty cliques...
Narcs love it. Shit stirring is crack to them. And while I'm 'yes, believe victims', there are definitely some trumping up of charges in some parts. Or, trumping up of defence to accusations to make their behaviour excusable. And you might think you're being a good friend...
By standing by them, but they don't have friends, only assets. You only exist for as long as you can give em something. Then, when your usefulness is done, boom, you don't exist anymore. They also have the most selective memories, which allows them to gaslight everyone.
"I would NEVER say that!" after you repeat a conversation word for word. "You're imagining things." This is bc they literally can't exist in a world where they're not perfect, so they SHIFT REALITY around inside their head. Or, take on a wounded tone, "I'm sorry I'm not as...
...smart as YOU." This is all to garner sympathy and avoid facing wrongdoing. We all have narcissistic tendencies, it's a spectrum like most things but if there's someone at the malignant, unrepentant, gleefully shitty end of the scale...
You can't fix that. Sometimes the only thing you can do is ghost them. Some, like family members, you can't do that with, so you develop coping mechanism. But yeah, if you suspect someone of being a narc, it makes all their actions suddenly make sense.
Btw, if you're sincerely worried it's you, congrats! Merely considering your behaviour and wondering if it could have harmed others means YOU'RE NOT a narc. They are not capable of it.
Some resources http://parrishmiller.com/narcissists.html https://thoughtcatalog.com/shahida-arabi/2016/06/20-diversion-tactics-highly-manipulative-narcissists-sociopaths-and-psychopaths-use-to-silence-you/
