A lot of BIPOC have been experiencing gaslighting by white folx not ready to take accountability for their behaviour. Gaslighting is a form of emotional and mental abuse that anyone can experience but it seems to be used in overdrive by white folx lately. Here’s some examples:

When BIPOC bring up problematic behaviour and a white person starts crying.

This is gaslighting.

Trust me we all want to cry but if BIPOC can hold it together while recalling harm that you have caused, you should be able to as well.

When BIPOC are offended by something a white person has said, posted, done & the response is: “I’m sorry you feel that way but that’s not what I meant.”

This is gaslighting.

If someone tells you have offended or harmed them. Apologize and do better. Period.

When BIPOC try to discuss white privilege, white supremacy or unconscious bias and a white woman brings up gender discrimination.

This is gaslighting.

This is why white feminism is so problematic and how white women try to absolve themselves from accountability.

When BIPOC spend time educating and calling you in but instead you see it as a threat and bring up your personal traumas to deflect from any critique.

This is gaslighting.

We all carry trauma but BIPOC who are sharing concerns with you are not your therapists.

Most of the time if your friends are Black, Indigenous or a Person of Colour and they are bringing concerns to your attention, this is because they care. Please do not gaslight them and turn a teachable moment to do better into emotional abuse or trauma.