Thread by @ShalyahEvans, Gather ‘round the fire, let me tell you a terrifying true dating [...]

Gather ‘round the fire, let me tell you a terrifying true dating story... THREAD

I’m currently staying at my mom’s in The Napa Valley. I got bored and went on Hinge- as one does. I started talking to a guy who was cute and interesting and wanted to see my googly eye art. We eventually exchanged numbers and texted back and forth for a week. Normal stuff.

He asked me if I wanted to get together (distanced if I felt more comfortable) to have some wine and watch the sunset. This seems like a lovey offer. So I said yes. I wasn’t free for several more days so we planned on a Saturday evening. The night before he texted me until late.

Saturday arrived and he texted when he woke up that he had a whole plan for that evening. I told him I would be free after 5. I didn’t hear from him again. I asked for a time, a place- nothing. He stopped responding.
I sulked and my friends and I talked shit.

On Wednesday I get this (included my last texts from Saturday)

I told him he was a mess and he sent me screen grabs of him trying to find his phone through his Instagram. He also followed me on Instagram which, to me, confirms this is a real person, which I obviously considered was the problem.

If you were pretending to be someone that person wouldn’t know to follow the person you are lying to? Right?

On the topic of cat fishing: I googled his phone number, it confirmed his name. His Instagram has tagged photos from friends and family members, and his Instagram stories match the things he was telling me he was going to do later that day, like visit his grandpa or see friends

I decided that while I obviously needed to keep this guy at arms length I was also still bored in Napa so if he was a wreck that’s fine. I also told him that was how I felt. That I like talking to him but now I know he’s a mess.

He asked to come pick me up on Thursday, but it was kind of last minute so I suggested Friday instead. He said he had dinner plans with his brother on Friday, which it turns out devolved into drinking with his roommates.

So could we do Saturday? Wine and sunset? According to him he still had the blanket and cooler in his car from when he messed up the week before. I said yes. Saturday morning:

And then nothing. I asked for a time or a place. NOTHING. Look- I know at this point it’s fool me twice shame on me but WHO APOLOGIZES THAT MUCH AND THEN DOES THE SAME THING?!? It’s unbelievable. This time though he texted back late at night...

He said that he had been hanging with a friend in Sacramento all day and stayed longer than he should have and that he was so embarrassed that he didn’t say anything

Again I KNOW I’ve stuck in this too long but also it’s beyond my understanding of human behavior at this point so my brain cannot fathom that it will get worse. This seems like the worst- right? This is a flake. But this flake offers multiple dates to make it up to me.

He apologized. He explained that he’s just really bad at confrontation and he knows he handled everything so poorly. He flirts very well. At this point I’m so far past disbelief that I’ve circled back into belief. Please keep in mind I’m bad at dating as you continue reading.

Today was the day I was free. The final text was that I asked if could bring anything. He said nothing he could think of.

Just before 6 I texted him that I was on my way. Nothing, but that’s fine, maybe he’s getting ready- we set a time and I have the address...

I arrived at 93 Summerbrooke Circle. My phone knew where this was and took me there. My phone said “arrived”... but there was no 93... there was 91... and then 95... you’ve got to be shitting me... maybe it’s a back house? So I text. Nothing. I call nothing. I text again. Nothing

I gave 15mins. I call and leave a message saying you come outside right now and show me your face or I assume you are a psycho and you are done forever. Nothing. So here I am. I’m in UTTER DISBELIEF THAT ANYONE COULD BEHAVE THIS WAY.

Do I say his name?
I know I report him on @hinge .
I know I call the winery he works at tmw (get ready @paraduxxwine )
I know I message his mother on Instagram.
But do I say his name?
I don’t think he’s isn’t who he says he is.
I think he’s cruel and enjoying this.

We both have a few salacious pics of each other- I came into acting with a “nudity is fine” attitude so I don’t think it would be awful if he retaliated... do I say his name? I would never give him the satisfaction of sharing a dick pic so unfortunately for him he’s safe there.

I made a comment early on in our conversation that I think my mom is still afraid of me because I was a nightmare teenager-
he should have asked what kind of nightmare I am.
It’s the revenge kind.

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