Every Arsenal season basically: a thread.

August: Win about half the games, get sizeable amounts of points, have a good start, sit about 5th, 6th around 6 points from first place. The season looks good so far, but it’s too early to say anything. Will suffer an unfair loss to a big side. (Average position: 6th )

September: Win a few more matches, and being to seriously hover around the top 4 spaces, sit around 3rd but a loss will make you drop 3 places. Will suffer a loss or a draw somewhere in this month to United at OT. (Average position: 3rd )

October: Do well enough to believe you can mount a title challenge. Stay in the top 4 and beat a big side convincing you the season will be different, even though it won’t. Will lose to Man City or Liverpool the month away. (Average position: 4th )

November: Somewhere in this month we’ll probably have a NLD at some point, it will 100% be at the Emirates, and 90% of the time it’s either a convincing win or a shit draw. Average results for the month. Also, a major injury is guarantee to happen. (Average position: 5th )

December: Will fuck up in the Christmas period, even though the games were there for us to win, and we will drop points and create a sizeable gap between us and 4th. Will lose around 3-0 to a relegation team. (Average position: 5th )

January: Begin to pick up speed, winning a few more games, do well in the FA Cup, and get more points, closing the top 4 game and dipping in and out of top 4 during the month. Will 90% of the time either beat Chelsea at the Emirates or 0-0 draw (Average position: 4th )

February: Start to drop points, fuck up a lot, piss around and lose easy games, somewhere down the line an injury will happen that will sideline a key player for about a year. We would play Spurs in the NLD and lose 1-0 to a Kane penalty. (Average position: 6th )

March: Will fuck up even more to the point where it’s nearly impossible for us to get top 4, by losing to probably Crystal Palace and some team like Southampton. (Average position: 6th )

April: The moment that there’s a 1% chance we get top 4 that’s when the players decide to actually win games, and we win a few matches here and there. (Average position: 6th )

May: Win 3 games and finish out of the top 4 by a point. (Average position: 5th )