Read on Twitter
Around about today is the 5 year anniversary of the most head-spinning job interview I& #39;ve ever had. Let me regale you, if I may.
Started on a nice sunny day, driving along the coast for a position at a "medical equipment manufacturer". Sounded interesting, I thought...
Started on a nice sunny day, driving along the coast for a position at a "medical equipment manufacturer". Sounded interesting, I thought...
Arrive early, as you do, and walk up to a small but neat looking office on an industrial estate. No alarm bells or sense of foreboding, yet.
Buzz for entry, but end up waiting for a fair old bit before I actually get let inside...
Buzz for entry, but end up waiting for a fair old bit before I actually get let inside...
The guy who lets me in leaves me in some barren hallway & #39;reception area& #39; where I spend another age waiting, sitting on one of two cheap chairs beside a rubber plant that looked to have PTSD. Still, no real bad feelings...
After 15mins of waiting, 5mins into my actual interview slot, I get told that the guy interviewing me is running late. Fine. No harm done.
But, what it does give me is the opportunity to see the door to what appears to be a warehouse open at the end of the hall...
But, what it does give me is the opportunity to see the door to what appears to be a warehouse open at the end of the hall...
"medical equipment manufacturer", according to the advert and job spec...
I was not expecting to see people lugging around boxes of what looked to be lube, condoms and other assorted items intended to enhance your pleasure.
Alarm bells start ringing in earnest...
I was not expecting to see people lugging around boxes of what looked to be lube, condoms and other assorted items intended to enhance your pleasure.
Alarm bells start ringing in earnest...
Interviewer arrives another 5mins later and whisks me off into what looks to be their boardroom.
I sit down, and it takes me the grand total of 30 seconds to form the opinion that the man& #39;s a whopping great bellend...
I sit down, and it takes me the grand total of 30 seconds to form the opinion that the man& #39;s a whopping great bellend...
We start the interview talking about hobbies, interests, that sort of thing. In addition to the usual football and stuff, it comes out that I like to write in my spare time. "Oh, everyone likes to think they& #39;re a writer" is the reply.
Your man ascends from bellendry to twatdom.
Your man ascends from bellendry to twatdom.
I resist saying "you ain& #39;t read nothing like what I write about, mate".
The interview itself involves my newest mate talking about the guy I& #39;ll be replacing, as if he& #39;d died rather than resigned. I push past that and ask about what they do there (medical manufacturer, remember).
The interview itself involves my newest mate talking about the guy I& #39;ll be replacing, as if he& #39;d died rather than resigned. I push past that and ask about what they do there (medical manufacturer, remember).
Turns out they trade in a bit of everything. No manufacturing, but they import and sell all sorts of items of the ilk that they have in their warehouse. Whatever they think& #39;ll sell well, you know how it is
(Alarm bells get louder)...
(Alarm bells get louder)...
He starts to ask your typical interview questions, still with the personality of a flesh-eating virus...
but I think my face looks like a smacked arse enough for him to think it best to call the interview early (I was a minute or so from doing the same).
I get taken to the exit
but I think my face looks like a smacked arse enough for him to think it best to call the interview early (I was a minute or so from doing the same).
I get taken to the exit
