I had a friend ask me the other day if it’s affirming to me, as a black person, to visit the Caribbean where I am in the majority vs being a minority in America. Well it’s layered, I said. Because I actually reflect on that a lot.

In America I do feel small. In Vincy, I feel American (bc I am). While it’s nice to see ppl who look like me, it would be naive to forget the privilege I have and the disparity it inherently brings. So I carry that in mind, and try to be mindful of it.

But that aside, what really gets to me is the insidious white gaze that tourism caters to as an industry. I just don’t like it and I know it’s v normalized & maybe inescapable but it still feels gross to me.

to an extent tourists are concentrated to specific areas so it’s not a major issue, but I do frown at the fact that there are literal parts of the country exclusive to celebs or the wealthy, I don’t like that...

I do wish that islands were not dependent on tourism the way they are but I get it.

I think I also just feel a way cause like. It really upset me to know that my mother left home & didn’t really have the means to go back much at all during my childhood, while having classmates who would brag abt vacation in Jamaica over summer break.

anyway I’ve like vowed to visit annually if not more often, as an adult with the means now, but I muse a bit about tourism & whiteness & imperialism in that sense bc it’s just glaring every time I go