Since May I've been teargassed twice, shot at, shoved with billy clubs, arrested, left for hours in agony from zipcuffs that caused nerve damage, cut by a cop with a knife, and watched my husband get shot w rubber bullets twice.

Chapo: *sends a troll brigade to call me a cop*

They're helping out a huge misogynist TrueAnon brigade attacking me, *falsely* accusing me of saying people should post video/photos from BLM.

It's especially gross bc the last time TrueAnon brigaded me, it was to say what a hero its hosts were for livestreaming BLM protests.

The dirtbags are always pretty horrible, but this is just the most cruel, sick shit.

I'm literally in the middle of trying to find a therapist because the PTSD from this has been so bad, and they're actively trying to trigger me by equating me with the people who brutalized us.

Tear gas is an abortifacient, by the way.

When I stood up from writing this thread the day after the gassing/shootings on 676, there was a pool of blood where I'd been sitting.

I'm still trying to understand whether it was coincidence or miscarriage. https://twitter.com/gwensnyderPHL/status/1267854994994274305

This is what dirtbag brigading looks like.

It isn't just, shitposting and trolling.

It's taking a survivor of recent police trauma, mischaracterizing a nuanced racial justice critique they made, and getting thousands of people to call them a cop.

For kicks and clicks.

I'm sad and anxious all the time.

I can't stop thinking of the cops that refused to wear COVID masks even around those of us at heightened risk.

I can't stop flashing back to the way they mocked us women in the bus with me screamed and thrashed in pain from zipcuffs.

My cuts from that police knife still haven't healed completely.

My husband's back and thigh are still painful to look at.

I jump whenever I hear fireworks because they sound like tear gas canisters firing to me.

I've been so stressed that I got what turned out to be an ocular migraine, I ended up in the hospital last week for hours of tests and an MRI scan.

Apart from calling their critics CIA psy-ops, TrueAnon/Chapo dirtbags never cared about police, racism, or police brutality.

Now they're using this moment to come for racial justice activists that criticized them for their racism past, and calling us cops.

I'm not trying to make myself out to be an exception or a hero or whatever.

I went out, I put my body on the line, and that's what thousands of other people did, too, and Black folks got hurt worst for it.

But I do think it's necessary to walk through this again, note that I have tried to be open and honest about the psychological toll of witnessing and being subjected to this violence, and be really clear that these podcast hosts watch me for trollable posts and know this shit.

They know it, and their answer has been to misrepresent my words, then send thousands of trolls after me to trigger me around my experiences at protests and try to convince the internet that I'm in league with the cops who traumatized us.

They're always mean-spirited, misogynist, and dishonest, but this is just straight-up sadistic.

They know full well that all I argued was that when it comes to protest photo posting, Black people should be the ones making the call, not white people.

That's not racist, and it's certainly not pro-cop.

It's a reminder for white folks to check themselves and follow Black movement rather than try to speak for it and lead it.

They know that.

They don't care.

They just want to cause pain and re-trigger trauma.

I'm really, really thankful to those of you who have done the unending work of making sure that these brigades don't go unchallenged in their ugly, spiteful attacks.

I'd hoped it was over, but the CTH hosts are clearly just trying to stick the knife in as deep as they can.

Their goal is always, always to silence their target, and they've stooped lower and lower with each attempt to shut me up.

Now I'm seeing blue checks who should know better-- people I'd respected-- scenting the blood and joining in, too.

Normally I'd say fuck you and try and fight it, but I am just so drained and sad and constantly re-traumatized seeing folks accuse me of trying to feed protester identities to the people who shot & gassed & tortured us that I do not have the energy to stick around through it.

I'm taking a break for a bit, at least until my notifications become something other than a constant stream of cruel, intentional, and sadistic triggers for the trauma I'm grappling with right now.

In the meantime:

To the folks I know who thought it would be fun to join the dogpile: I am so disappointed in you.

To the trolls & podcast hosts who trigger trauma for lulz: you are terrible people, and I hope you someday find yourself to a place where you're capable of shame.

Much more importantly, though, thank you again for folks who have shown up, spoken out against the abusive behavior, refused to let the lies stand, and reached out to show me love and solidarity and support even though I'm not in a space where I can reciprocate much right now.

I'm hoping it's just hours or a day or two I need, we'll see.

In the meantime, take care and keep making Nazis miserable every day and every way.

Love and solidarity, friends.

Talk to you soon.