"do you love the cello but hate sitting down? try: THE VIOLA (or The Shoulder Cello™, as I like to call it)"
"do you love the violin but hate that whiny-ass E-string? want a li& #39;l more *chutzpah*? maybe it& #39;s time to try: THE VIOLA"
"do you love the violin but want 85-90% less repertoire? ask you doctor if THE VIOLA is right for you"
"do you want to play the violin but also don& #39;t give a shit about viciously clawing your way to stardom, regardless of the collateral damage? you might consider: THE VIOLA"
"are you comfortable digging heavily into new music to compensate for being a blind spot in warhorse repertoire? try THE SAXOPH----- I mean uh THE VIOLA"