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Why does the recent allegations of sexual assault affect me so much? Because it happened to me at my own damn industry party.
A few years back at PAX East my company threw a joint after part with another company we often worked with. It was supposed to be low key, no loud music, no people the organizers didn& #39;t know or personally invite.
On the show floor before the party an influencer, a woman who streamed on the Twitch platform made several stops in my booth. We interacted a couple times but it began to make me feel uncomfortable to the point that I had to ask @AmazingFletch to step in.
Even as an industry professional it& #39;s hard to straight up say no to an agressive influencer. You don& #39;t want to lose a possible professional relationship over some misunderstanding. So I asked Fletch to try to jump in and be her point of contact when this person came to the booth.
It didn& #39;t work, she continued to seek me out as long as I was present in the booth and would continue to initiate conversation that often veered into light flirting that made me feel very uncomfortable. It was noticeable to my colleagues.
Anyone that knows me knows I& #39;m always up for a challenge. But when it comes to things like this, I& #39;m awkward as fuck. I had a relationship I wanted to protect, and I am so inexperienced with how to deal with this stuff that I simply just run away.
Fast forward to the party and things are going like they do at events. I didn& #39;t drink (I rarely drink at events and never at work sponsored events) I spent a lot of time helping a woman who was having a panic attack, and met some amazing people.
But then she arrived. She immediately found me and began talking about how much she had been drinking. Fletch was such a champ that he some how saw this from across the bar and came and grabbed me and told me loudly that there was something I really needed to deal with.
I avoided her for a couple hours but eventually she came up behind me when I was ordering a drink at the bar and tried to whisper something in my ear, I couldn& #39;t make it out. When I turned around she was in my face.
I& #39;ll never forget the next part. She told me that she gives such good oral sex that men pass out. Then she quickly grabbed my crotch, and gave it a solid squeeze. I literally dropped my cup of water on the floor and pulled her hand off my groin.
I spent the next 40 min in the basement trying to come to terms with exactly what had just happened. I remember Casey and Darshelle from Filthy Casual finding me sitting in the dark asking what I was doing. I just told them I was looking for the bathroom.
My story isn& #39;t coerced sex, it& #39;s not the worst assault anyone has experienced but it was real. The problem is that some of the people I tell joke about it and tell me I should be flattered that a cute streamer was so in to me.
Some people tell me its weak sauce and that it shouldn& #39;t affect me like it does. To this day @AmazingFletch is still always on the look out for her, he always comes and tells me to leave the booth then she is around. I literally run in fear of this person.
I never told my then partner, I didn& #39;t want her to think I had any part in imitating it. I didn& #39;t report it becuase maybe it want really that bad. But here I am years later and it has still taken something from me.
So yes, I support everyone who comes forward. I fully understand that when someone assaults you they take something from you. They rip away the feeling of security you have in a place that you are supposed to be able to take joy in. They sour something wonderful.
No matter the severity of what you experience I support you. I believe you.
I can& #39;t stress what a solid friend @AmazingFletch was during this. It made me feel so weak to have to constantly throw him out as a body block, but the dude is a true blue friend. He never once made me feel bad for it or for running.
