Read on Twitter
tomorrow marks 3 years since i was r*ped and this is the first year that i feel peace with what happened so that’s fucking awesome but now i will make this pointless thread abt it
I 100% went through grief. it took me 5 months of blaming myself for what happened before i was told it was rape. Despite screaming no and pushing all i could i was convinced i put myself in that situation and if anyone tried telling me different i thought they were wrong
Also because you see and hear about #metoo 
https://abs.twimg.com/hashflags... draggable="false" alt=""> everywhere, to think it happened to you and youve just had to go about your life it seems like its not significant enough to be true/real/valid. That was Denial.
When I accepted it for what it was i was enraged. I was ready to beat the shit out of my perpetrator at any given moment. I wanted to key his car and scream at any girl who would even look at him to run away. That was anger. And its probably the most angry ive ever felt
Everyones story is different but a big part of my rage came from knowing this person well. It came from letting them off the hook because I blamed myself. It came from not a single person knowing what actually happened. And it came from the fear that i might not be the only one
After i started to make peace within myself (baby steps) I wasnt angry but i was hurt. I remember any talk of rape would immediately make me breakdown and when a teacher in high school addressed it, I brokedown in class and as a result shared the story with my friends
That was bargaining. Sharing my story
3 years later I’ve reached acceptance. I still am not sure how being raped changes or affects you and i’ve had my times where its come about subconsciously where I’m blacked out and breaking down over it on june 23rd without knowing its the anniversary or i’ll wake up at night
Regardless ive come far enough to not feel angry at myself or anyone else and I can openly discuss the topic of rape and remain calm. But grieving it is real and if i never spoke about it i would never know what happened so its important to listen and validate people
along w the subconscious thing- in 2017 5 months after i was told i was raped by a therapist who forced me to accept it. fast forward to march 2020 i had to visit a counseling center for school and being in a therapy setting triggered a breakdown and it took me a while to realize
what had caused my anxiety and panick in the moment
anyways im a boss and the therapist told my dad before she made me accept it so im gonna show him this thread bc he’ll be proud of me
but also fuck her shes a hoe for prying about it and not helping w what i went there for and making me dwell on it so maybe im not over it but yeah fuck you therapist lady eat my shorts
