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I was beyond triggered today. Fianceé and I had a spat and she started yelling... Immediate survival instincts kicked in from childhood.
I am documenting this because this is how serious triggers are. It's not about being offended or grossed out.w
I am documenting this because this is how serious triggers are. It's not about being offended or grossed out.w
When the yelling concluded I went into survival mode:
-Short, shallow breaths from the mouth. Nose is too whistle-y.
-Imagining my body is made of stone, so I don't move.
-Let the tears fall but don't vocalize my hurt.
-Dissociate, "leaving my body"
-Short, shallow breaths from the mouth. Nose is too whistle-y.
-Imagining my body is made of stone, so I don't move.
-Let the tears fall but don't vocalize my hurt.
-Dissociate, "leaving my body"
We worked things out after she apologized for yelling. We are safe 100%. Yelling is just a trigger that puts us in serious lock down mode. Yelling is something that happens sometimes, but it is so triggering that we feel like we're going to die.
This is why we get upset about non-traumatized folks using "triggered" so casually. Facing triggers is PAINFUL. Facing triggers is RE-TRAUMATIZING. Triggers are serious. Please don't trivialize them...
