Anyone else looking at their ever shrinking mental list of male idols and inspirations in their field thinking "oh God oh please be one of the good ones."

To all the people going "just don't have idols then", understand it can be as small as learning that the singer of that song that really spoke to you was a garbage person. For many people that just taints the memory. You don't have to worship someone to be disappointed in them.

Creators of any kind will have people and pieces of media they look(ed) to for inspiration and direction. Stuff you connect with that informs your own work and choices. It's unavoidable and it's valid to feel let down that a certain influence turned out to be a garbage human.

And yes, this obviously applies to women too (Rowling comes to mind), but right now there's a trend of specifically cis men in male dominant industries being outed as predators and abusers because the culture they exist in harbors and enables them, that's the context.