toxic masculinity comes in varying degrees. some mild. some obvious. some invisible. all dangerous. toxic masculinity refers to a mentality associated with “being masculine” that ultimately leads to destructive behavior and at its worst, trauma. violence. abuse. death.

it can look like repressing your emotions. it can look like a fear of rejection. a callousness to sensitive situations. being in denial. a fear of losing power. a need to GAIN power. a need to abuse power. it can look like, “here’s my mancave, no women allowed!”

it can sound like, “you’re being too sensitive, it’s not a big deal.” it can look like men treating their one lesbian friend like she’s “one of the guys!” (this has been me.) this can feel like your closest male friend not believing you when you said you were raped.

it looks like telling a friend to get into voice chat when they already expressed they feel uncomfortable. it looks like a griefer on your team friendly-firing you just because you spoke up in voice chat and he learned you weren’t a man. it can look like silly “for men” products.

if you, a man, have done any of the above or know someone who has partaken in toxic masculinity, show zero tolerance. be part of the change. i have ACTIVELY and KNOWINGLY excluded myself from so many circles in gaming and in the workplace BECAUSE OF MEN.

if you look around you and your circles are majority cis male? TIME TO RE-EVALUATE. even if you all are “nice fellows,” are your microscopic actions and jokes unknowingly creating an unsafe environment for others?

NORMALIZE ASKING YOURSELF, AM I DOING SOMETHING WORNG?

this thread comes from a need to promote awareness to toxic masculinity, a dangerous mindset that leads to so many abusive and violent situations. it varies wildly and can be hard to notice until it’s blatantly obvious. if someone gets hurt, it will be because you did not listen.