'Loneliness doesn't discriminate' – a thread. 1/8

It's #LonelinessAwarenessWeek, so I've seen this line quite a few times in the last 4 or 5 days. I know why people repeat it – Jo Cox said it, and she's been a beacon and inspiration for lots of good work. The full line is 'Young or old, loneliness doesn't discriminate.' 2/8

I read this primarily as a welcome attempt to shift attention towards loneliness in younger people. Even when it seems as though different groups experience similar levels of loneliness, though, the causes and components of their suffering might be completely different. 3/8

There are two types of people or organisations who routinely use 'loneliness doesn't discriminate.' The first are people who I consider to say it in bad faith, who know perfectly well that this formulation renders it something to be vaguely sad about, rather than angry. 4/8

They use it specifically because it sanitises loneliness, disconnecting it from vital questions of exclusion, invisibility, marginalisation, alienation, and deep-seated structural violence and harm such as racism, ableism, and transphobia. 5/8

The second, though, are people and groups who do genuinely good work, very often engaging directly with these vital questions - at the same time as saying that 'loneliness doesn't discriminate.' 6/8

This is really a plea to think for a moment about that phrase, what it says and what it does. Do you really believe it? What work is it doing, and do you approve of that work? Who or what are you giving a free pass to? What doesn't it allow us to think or confront? 7/8

And most importantly, whose experiences is it silencing? This started out as a well-intentioned call to diversify who we think of as feeling lonely. It increasingly feels like deflection, coming between us and the searching questions about discrimination we need to ask. 8/8