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Why do rapists and molesters thrive? A thread:
When a rich man or woman is violently robbed, do we say they deserved it because they are so wealthy? It was only a matter of time that wealth enticed someone to steal it?
But then when it comes to rapists and molesters, those are criminals too. Yes? So why do we try to reduce this crime by hiding it and sweeping it under the rug? Is it not also a crime? Whether it happens to boys or girls, men or women, why is it logical to shame the victim?
We don't shame those who are violently robbed. We actually sympathize and feel sorry for them. So why is the energy different for rapists and molesters?
You see rapists and molesters thrive because they know communities, more often than not, will protect them and will side with them. My experience with the male teacher and my headmaster is a prime example of this. Those who know, pretend they don't.
Adults who you would expect to look out for young children and teens, fail them consistently. Either by pretending they don't know this happens. Or, by protecting those doing it.
Or, by reinforcing the flawed ideology that only those who have something "wrong with them" or those "who do something wrong" get raped or molested.
But then lets' think of all the babies and infants who are raped and molested as an example. Recently, we saw the story about Baby Ruqayya. And it's not the only one that has been circulating in the TL. What wrong did they do? Where should they have run to?
What do you tell children, teens, and girls who are raped/molested by their fathers, their brothers, and their uncles.
Where should they have gone? How should they have removed themselves from these situations?
Where should they have gone? How should they have removed themselves from these situations?
Is their sitting room where they watch cartoons a compromising environment? And what of young boys who are inappropriately touched by their step-mothers?
Many studies show that most rape or sexual assault victims know their attacker. And it's estimated that around 25% of those assaulted (number varies by country) are assaulted by family members.
So, here is the thing. In whatever situation, whether involving a minor or a non-minor, there is one thing in common: the criminal.
"If you don’t really understand perpetrators, you’re never going to understand sexual violence,” said Sherry Hamby, editor of the journal Psychology of Violence."
- The NYT, https://www.nytimes.com/2017/10/30/health/men-rape-sexual-assault.html
- The NYT, https://www.nytimes.com/2017/10/30/health/men-rape-sexual-assault.html
Yourell & McCabe cited the following in their paper published in 2014: "It is concluded that the majority of rapists are motivated by an aggression incorporating power, acceptance of violence, revenge and anger."
"They are also motivated by a combination of aggression and sexual expression resulting from an extension of the traditional male sex-role."
The full paper can be found here: https://doi.org/10.1080/00021369.1988.11005977
I have reshared a post by another woman here on TL about how Rasul (SAW) dealt with such an incident.
It was reported by al-Tirmidhi:
From the Islamic perspective, protecting rapists, molesters, etc. implicitly or explicitly, is to uphold an injustice. And perpetrating an injustice is a sin.
