Thinkin about how one of my coworkers at my day job told me at a holiday party that she instantly figured out I wasn’t straight because once she saw me push the elevator button at work like this.

She said I also sometimes pushed the button like this and I don’t think I’ve ever screamed in my head harder.

She put her hands up to demonstrate and everything!!! The CEO was there!!!!!

Her; You’re really elegant, but you also don’t have any fingernails.

Me, dying: I’m a writer, I need my hands for typing. Please stop.

Her, gently: it’s okay....... you’re among friends.....