Thread. Reading yet another article with someone moaning about how they have to “think hard about every little thing they say” in case they “accidentally” cause offence. Here’s the thing. The language of racism, misogyny and hate is deeply embedded.

The Language of Hate is embedded like a tick and for most of us we can’t see that. Every day my eyes are opened to something that had been masked to me before. I listen, I hear, I learn, and I try to adjust. It’s not quick, but bit by bit I’ll stop using this old language.

When it’s pointed out to me that something is not right about what I’m saying, I’m not going to get angry about it, I’m going to do exactly the same as I would when I learn a new language and acknowledge the correction and remember it and add it to my language patterns.

Where it’s appropriate for me to do so, I’m going to pass on that learning to others. So, do me a favour, the next time someone points something out to you, don’t get angry or take it personally, this is how language works. It’s grows and evolves to better suit the world.

The next time someone you hear someone say, “do you know that’s a racist term?”, or “can you double check their pronouns?”, or “I feel uncomfortable when you use that term” don’t get upset, it’s important we listen, hear, and learn. It’s not my place to get upset.

Upshot is that, yup, some of us might have to think hard about “every little thing”. But if you were routinely offending people all around you, it’s definitely time to take a step back and think about “every little thing”, and acknowledge it wasn’t a “little thing” to others.

Someone once angrily said to me “how long will we have to keep apologising to people for stuff done in the past?”
No idea. We don’t have agreed limits on the use of the word “sorry”, feel free to use it whenever it’s required. It makes us stronger with every use, not weaker.