Happy Wednesday! Today we& #39;re going to delve into the universe of DISNEY& #39;S GARGOYLES, the 90s show that made medieval architecture cool again!
This cartoon is sponsored by my dear wonderful friend @ silver-millennial, who donated to Black Lives Matter! If you& #39;d like to do the same, find some information here: https://sailormoonsub.tumblr.com/post/621041236476903424/sailormoonsub-sailormoonsub-hey-all-ive">https://sailormoonsub.tumblr.com/post/6210...
Some organizations are already oversaturated with donations– this article from 2 days ago showcases some smaller foundations and funds that can still use help! Thanks to everyone who& #39;s donated so far. https://nymag.com/strategist/article/where-to-donate-for-black-lives-matter.html">https://nymag.com/strategis...
Honestly if you told me tomorrow that boulders have begun raining down from the heavens in Midtown Manhattan I& #39;d be like "classic 2020"
the fire hydrant breaks and instead of blasting her in the face with a torrent of water it has the dignity to become an extremely aesthetic and dramatic spattering of rain
Of COURSE I’m trespassing! It’s tenth century Scotland! This is the only hobby! What ELSE am I gonna do besides conquer territory? Grow plants like some nerd monk?
Little known fact: the first YEET in recorded history actually occurred over one thousand years ago!
Tower guard on his first day of work who managed to sling 1 arrow in the vague direction of the invading army: I did this!! I& #39;m special!!!
Goliath: well if I say anything NOW then I& #39;ll look like an asshole
Goliath: well if I say anything NOW then I& #39;ll look like an asshole
"I just don& #39;t want beasts to dine in the same room as me" bitch there& #39;s already dogs right there in the Mead-Hall! Just say you& #39;re gargoylephobic
So the humans have stripped the gargoyles of their rights and made them second-class citizens in their own territory??? Gee good thing that this is just in fantasy and not in real life..........
Yo I don& #39;t want to alarm you but I think your castle is like. 1 dance party away from falling into the Atlantic.
Men in shadowy hooded cloaks are ALWAYS trying to make deals that appeal to your hubris while serving their own aims
Also I am DEEPLY inspired by the wings that can fold up into a cape. Thinking about working this in to my post-quarantine wardrobe somehow.
Am I gonna be emo about how the gargoyles don& #39;t feel the need to identify themselves individually because they& #39;re all part of a collective of friends??? Yeah I am!! What are you going to do about it??
I& #39;m not entirely sure about the technicalities of the Gargoyle Rules, but if they turn to stone when the sun rises, then it took this guy a surprisingly long time to think of "attack during the day instead of at night"
DAMN THE 1 GUY WHO THINKS GARGOYLES ARE CHILL JUST SOLD OUT HIS GARGOYLE-HATING KINGDOM TO.... ANOTHER GUY WHO ALSO HATES GARGOYLES
Princess "Gargoyles Don& #39;t Have Rights" sure has changed her tune ever since they ended up being her only chance at survival!
This Viking Vs. Gargoyle showdown can only end in blood and these peasants all seem very chill with it.
The Mouse Company: We need to dispose of the villain in a manner that is bloodless and doesn& #39;t put any blame on the virtuous protagonist.
Precarious ledge over a steep fall: Don& #39;t worry I got this
Precarious ledge over a steep fall: Don& #39;t worry I got this
Just to be clear: i didn& #39;t kill that guy, but i REALLY WANTED TO
Goliath: Listen if I& #39;m going to be turned into a statue for 1000+ years, I& #39;m going to look GOOD while I& #39;m doing it!!!
This is one of those quotes that& #39;s like "oh who said that? Thomas Hobbes? Shakespeare?" and no it& #39;s Evil 90s Will Riker from Gargoyles
For personal reasons I will be reconstructing a haunted medieval Scottish castle on top of my NYC penthouse
Let me pretend for a minute that Xanatos is just genuinely happy to have reunited all these devoted friends with one another
Hear that? He& #39;s telling us to eat him
Did Xanatos seriously buy a castle so that his secret lab would have built-in bodyguards? There& #39;s other home security systems and they only take like an afternoon to install
Xanatos: Well funny you should mention that! (hands Maza a document titled Petition for Xanatos’ Awesome Sky Castle to Secede from the United States)
That’s the face of a man who knows that you don’t need permits for laser guns if nobody knows that laser guns have been invented
One of these days your sarcastic comments to yourself while conducting a secret investigation are going to get you BUSTED but until then please continue
to be fair if I was swept up in the arms of a ripped statue and flown to safety I would say "OK" too
Goliath and Maza have only known each other 5 minutes and they& #39;re already arguing about how justice cannot hold when laws are tools designed to maintain the interests of the policymakers and their donors :& #39;) I say in all sincerity this is the beginning of a wonderful friendship
First lesson: which pizza places are good, and which ones should have been shut down for health code violations years ago.
"think of them as magic talismans" works as an explanation for anyone who died before 1970 and anyone who was born after 1990
WOW THE PLOT TWISTS DON& #39;T STOP COMING FOR EVEN A MINUTE DO THEY
"To give something a name is to project the viewer’s false constructed identity, and it’s a ridiculous task to presume to know such an eternal majestic thing as this earth! Who can claim ownership over, for instance, this river?”
“This is so awkward, but, the state of New York.”
“This is so awkward, but, the state of New York.”
This is one of those moments where it suddenly hits me that this movie aired pre-9/11 and I realize how many of the American shows that I grew up with in the early 2000s had a mild air of nationalistic propaganda. Existential crisis time brb
*I do think the justice system should focus on crime prevention rather than punishment by providing health services and alleviating poverty, but if we& #39;re just looking at short term individual solutions, having a gargoyle smack em around a little bit is probably pretty effective
what you call "an unfortunate traffic accident on the extraordinarily empty streets of NYC," I call a FREE MOTORCYCLE!!!
If mankind was inherently evil, would my mom have sung to me when I was a child?? Checkmate scientists!!! I can probably think of other examples too if you give me a minu [my monologue on humanity& #39;s potential for kindness is interrupted by a kidnapping]
villains: hehehe they& #39;re never find this cleverly planted tracker (the tracker is bright red, the size of an Oreo, and has the company& #39;s design emblazoned on its face)
I think I speak for all the geologists here when I say, what KIND of rock do the gargoyles turn into when the sun rises?
no matter how many near-death experiences she goes through, Eliza Maza is ALWAYS at the top of her reductive commentary game
omg decorate him with Mardi Gras beads or a funny hat while he& #39;s imprisoned in stone by the sun
I LOVE that all the gargoyles have found value in recognizing themselves as individuals not defined by contingent relationships to others and I also love that they apparently chose these names in 20 seconds by taking a cursory glance at a map of NYC and saying "I vibe with that"
Can you imagine reuniting with the love of your life for the first time in 1000 years and the first thing they say to you is “This tender moment is brought to you by: David Xanatos. David Xanatos: you should help him find those floppy disks!™”
Xanatos in the background:
https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🤔" title="Denkendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Denkendes Gesicht"> gargoyle hugs must be great because they have a built-in blankie
we learned Modern English through the Sailor Moon dub to really capture the vernacular of the culture. here are some key phrases that we learned so far: That& #39;s major boss! You& #39;re buggin& #39;, girl! What a hunkasaurus!
every impenetrable fortress has a conspicuous trap door animated on a separate cel layer. it’s an important part of the design
this is what I picture in my head when someone says that major social media networks are stealing your information to sell to corporations
“I got what we came here for!”
“Great! Now we can leave without resorting to violen–”
“I’m gonna commit arson now!”
“Great! Now we can leave without resorting to violen–”
“I’m gonna commit arson now!”
“When you make an exception for Xanatos, you yourself are admitting that not all humans can be judged by the same standards!”
“I’m going to ignore that point because it doesn’t fit with my established ideology!”
“I’m going to ignore that point because it doesn’t fit with my established ideology!”
Of COURSE it is. Xanatos doesn’t care about what’s “smart” or “moral” or “a good idea” he just lives for the attention
in his defense all the local hired actors involved in the staged robbery were compensated well for their time and it& #39;s a big resume booster especially for those just starting out in the performing arts industry
YOU EVER JUST.... ACCIDENTALLY AGREE TO HELP ACTIVATE TECHNOLOGY THAT WILL ULTIMATELY REPLACE YOU WITH 5 COPIES OF YOURSELF THAT DON& #39;T HAVE FREE WILL
no offense but why did he even bother awakening the gargoyles if he was just gonna build gargoyles: this time with 150% more lasers
Actually my plan was backed up by research. In a randomized survey of 6000 participants, when given the choice between “a tenuous alliance with people who don’t respect you” and “a motherfuckin CASTLE” all of them picked the castle.
(1500 word essay on how, while most of the gargoyles chose their own names, Demona kept the one given to her by humans, and thus identifies herself through their perception of her: a frightening and unforgiving demonic entity)
you think you can scare me? i& #39;m too smug to fear death!
if you ever have any doubts about what decision you should make, just ask yourself: "will my ex feel like her misguided ethics have been entirely vindicated by my behavior?" also ask "how disappointed would the audience be if you killed off a character voiced by Jonathan Frakes"
Well she’s on all the major marketing and promotional materials so I’m gonna go ahead and say she’s fine.
(Goliath sitting in the front row at the stadium with a hot dog and a soda) quite frankly this wasn& #39;t what I was expecting at all
WHAT A WILD RIDE! That’s the end of the Gargoyles: The Awakening! A million thanks to @ silver-millennial [on tumblr] once again for selecting this show.
Gargoyles isn’t part of my usual programming here, but if you want to read more threads about it, you can sponsor an episode through ko-fi, patreon, or donation to a charity of your choice in support of BLM. https://sailormoonsub.tumblr.com/sponsor ">https://sailormoonsub.tumblr.com/sponsor&q...