STORY THREAD: When I was 21, I was an aspiring comedian and huge Chris D’Elia fan. One day, Chris tweeted about being in Toronto filming something, so I jokingly responded asking if he wanted to hang out. He DMed me to “hang out” almost immediately and I freaked out!

I was going to get to meet one of my biggest idols in comedy! I understood the subtext that he was going to try to have sex with me, what other interest would he have in “hanging out” with me, an otherwise nobody?

But I was young and dumb and just really wanted to meet a role model of mine so I agreed to meet him in public, at a bar. 10 minutes before our meeting time, he switched the location to his hotel bar. I sighed, knowing where this was going. But went anyway, I wanted to meet him!

When I arrived at the hotel bar, I ordered a drink and texted him, telling him I was there. Predictably, he told me to come to his hotel room. I said "no thank you, I prefer to meet at the bar”. He stopped responding.

I started drinking at the hotel bar while I reflected on the situation. Eventually, I texted him... asking what his room number was. He told me, and I charged all of my drinks to his room and left. THE END.