Bad Habits I Think Idols Have: a thread

Part of the reason K-Pop fans often view their idols as ideal beings incapable of making mistakes, is because the industry shelters us from the inconvenient truths - that they have undesirable, yet innately human traits, such as bad habits and questionable opinions.

For the most part, it maximises our idols' likeability and relatability, which makes them more marketable in an industry as cut-throat competitive as K-Pop.

However, it also has the unintended consequence of putting them under the pressure of meeting very unrealistic standards of beauty, etiquette and morality; as well as taking a toll on the self-esteem if young impressionable K-Pop fans.

My motive today is to alleviate some of the social pressure from idols by giving you a more accurate depiction of what your idols could be like when the cameras are turned off.

Below is a thread of possible bad habits that I h̶i̶g̶h̶l̶y̶ ̶s̶u̶s̶p̶e̶c̶t̶ suggest that my favorite K-Pop idols might have.

Hangyul's IG feed is full of Bible quotes and photos of him in Sunday service, but in his DMs he is always asking for dick pics from local influencers.

He says he hosts, but you have to wait until after midnight to sneak into his room in the dark so his parents won't hear.

Dahyun has been making too many flat Earth comments recently. None of her groupmates are particularly bothered by it, which suggests that she might believe in flat Earth theories for real.

Jaebum is most obviously a homophobe, but he wanks off into other members' shampoo bottles not as a prank but instead as some sick, twisted fetish to assert dominance. The stylists cannot figure out why the other members' hair have been very difficult to manage.

Haseul is one of those neat roommates who will put your stuff away and not remember where she put them.

She needs a clean, tidy room because she herself is a hoarder of poorly made items purchased from wish dot com.

Yoongi has a smaller than average penis, so he masturbates with his hand like this . After concerts, he would sit in bed and touch himself to the Fortune 509 list, before ejaculating at a photo of Jeff Bezos.

Wealth-hoarding Yoongi, a socialist he is no longer!

Eunha clogs the group chat with screenshots of messages from her assh0le boyfriend, often derailing the topic to make it about him.

She refuses to break up with him or take the actions necessary to mend their relationship. You're this close to kicking her out of the group chat.

Hobi hogs the TV in the living room by watching long, garbage telenovelas. It's his third time watching reruns of Maria La Del Barrio.

You have to study outside because the sound effects are distracting, but you can still hear the TV from the mess hall five doors down.

Sorn is the cutest girl in class but often times finds herself in bad company. She herself is morally against saying the N-word, but seems to have no qualms about her non-black friends using it.

Just this morning she shared an insta story with another racial slur in it.

Rooming with Wonho means that you have to buy a new bra every other week. One day you find all your bras under a pile of dirty laundry because he's been stealing them and quietly wearing them without your permission.

Sana confesses to bitch lesbians as a cruel prank. She also sends anon hate towards the clique member with the worst self-esteem, but makes sure to send some to herself too, so nobody suspects it was her all along.

Chanyeol never pulls his foreskin back. He wants to preserve some of that dick cheese to flavor his next Inkigayo sandwich.

While waiting for the next performance, Chanyeol sneaks to the custodian closet, jerks off and the smegma squirts out onto the bread like Easy Cheese.

Solbin thinks she's good at psychoanalyzing people, do she always digs deep into her love interests' social media history before the first date.

Her manager is there to pick her up right when her date tells her that he will call the police if she doesn't stop stalking him.

[if you haven't realized yet, all these habits are completely made up. let's establish that this is a joking thread]

Seokmin likes to go to the spa to unwind. Just an hour after going out, he tweeted that self-care day was cancelled and he's back on the grind.

He made no mention that he has moldy vulture claws as feet and that the masseuse would not get close to them without a hazmat suit on.

Vivi enjoys cosplaying and has never missed any anime conventions in cities near her.

Cosplaying is an expensive hobby, so she used a defunct payment method to buy her Asuka bodysuit. Vivi will sign up for another eBay account and delete the old one once the package arrives.

Ten insists that his fruit-averse diet isn't a health hazard. Except that one time he was jerking off upside down. He accidentally nut in his left eye and the corrosive substance burned half his face.

He woke up in the ER but had no memory of the incident.

IU has a rebellious attitude that is well admired by fans. In reality, she is also very difficult to work with.

IU has an important CF to record with Hyundai today, but she has other plans. She's on her way to buy borax, foam balls and glitter pigment for a new slime recipe.

During the early days of Wanna One's debut, JR had a lot of time on his hands. He has hung out at his grandma's house for the fifth time this week. She has a job, so she won't be home.

He will help himself to what's on the stove and scatter dirty underwear all over the floor.

Solji's Twitter account is the embodiment of proud independent womanhood. Her mutuals look up to her for taking shit from no man.

Her ex texted her today and intends to use her newfound popularity to grow his business. But Solji is too horny and will sleep with him anyway.

You catch Taecyeon eyeing your way at the gym. He walks closer and it turns out he was checking himself out at the mirror this whole time.

He asks you to move so he can use the machine, but he hasn't put the dumbbells back on the rack. You suddenly notice he smells like socks.

Your coworker Solar is due to take over your shift in two minutes. You see her in the cafe across the street holding hands with rich old man.

She's not in uniform, but has probably made more money on her date than you have this week. You cannot close the cafe until she comes.

Jaehyun's Grindr profile says he hosts, but when you arrive at his place you realize that it has nothing but an iPhone charger and a dusty mattress on the floor.

The smell of spit radiating from his pillow is distracting you from giving good head.

[since you guys didn't like my thread earlier on how the majority of idols are straight, I've posted plenty gay ones for your entertainment]

[should I go on?]

Jennie has been an avid K-Pop fan for 6 years, and is determined on making sure the internet knows how great her faves are.

She spent the last ten hours watching dancers, vocalists, producers and musicians pan her faves.

She will be making up rumours about those YouTubers.

Wonpil woke up to a knock on the door by a delivery of 17 extra large pizzas meant for the party next door.

He is too shy to say that he didn't order anything. He paid for the pizzas and will be eating all of them alone over the course of a month.

You get a call from a telemarketer one day and instantly recognize Seulgi's voice. You haven't heard from her since you two broke up.

You hang up when it dawns on you that she now has your new address & personal info. You run a Google search on how to get a restraining order.

Your boyfriend Kang Daniel is a dreamboat, but you can't get over how messy he is. He eats raw meat and leaves the packets all over the floor.

You tell him you want to move out because you think he makes the place awful to live in. The tapeworms in his intestines say otherwise.

The company's annual dinner is coming this Friday and Bona received a DM from a coworker asking if she wanted to be his date. She declined.

She was hoping he'd try again, but now he's found someone else.

She'll be home playing ACNH on the Switch as she does every Friday night.

Eric cannot concentrate on the Bible study zoom call whenever his group members are boning one another. The banging sound on the wall is distracting.

He subtweeted the offending members, but now woke K-Pop Twitter thinks he's homophobic.

He is, but they're missing the point.

Sunmi doesn't like babysitting her friend's son since it reminds her that she's still single. Today she puts Baby Shark on the TV on repeat for them to watch while she wanks off in the bathtub.

She fell asleep with her fingers inside. They are now too pruned to unlock her phone.

Mark swipes right on every girl on Tinder and types the same pickup line on each match with his Cheeto dust fingers.

Most of the women will take more than 5 minutes to respond, so you will hear him talk about how women don't give guys like him a chance on the Meninism FB page.

Chaeyeon has been suspicious of the new 5G tower built in town hall. Her Degree in Coronavirus from WhatsApp University gives her the confidence to argue with anyone who tells her that 5G is safe.

She's never looked at the tower long enough to notice it's actually a clock tower.

The proletariat uprising is around the corner and Namjoon knows his material wealth will be seized by the working class.

"If I can't have the money, then nobody can!" he says as he deposits half his money in untraceable offshore accounts and spends the rest on ugly KAWS dolls.

[which types of scenarios do you want to see more of? note: there's zero guarantee I'll abide by it ]

Yeri is a wannabe influencer on Instagram, but her feed is very haphazard and most companies don't see her brand fit for their image.

She needs money for a new eyeliner palette, so she takes up an offer to recommend an over-the-counter antifungal foot cream on her IG story.

Eunwoo cuddles up next to you, closing the halal gap you tried to maintain thus far. He can't help but let you know that he's never dated a Muslim girl before.

He says something about your hijab, but you couldn't pay attention over the odor of pork and soju in his breath.

Yves has waited three months for the lockdown in her city to end so she can go shopping again.

Every night at the mall, she comes in 10 minutes before closing to bother pretty saleswomen. She unfolds clothes on the racks, says "this is cute" then leaves without buying anything.

The arm of Jackson's wanking hand is disproportionately bigger than the other arm, so he has to coordinate his workout accordingly by adjusting the weights and the number of reps he does.

His friends suggested he should just wank less, but Jackson thinks it's too much work.

You never realized how frugal Hwasa was before she took you out on your first date together. You were dressed all nice for a picnic by the side of the highway and all she brought was breadsticks, canned beans & Reese's pieces.

You forgot to bring the can opener like she asked.

Sometimes you feel like Junhoe has purposely kept you in the dark about the whole crooked penis thing. It rubs against you in all the wrong spots so you can't wait for him to finish.

You moan his name and grab his ass as he ejaculates directly into your fallopian tube.

Nayeon's biggest weakness is her attraction to boys, and the things she will do for their attention.

In a game of Turth or Dare, she exposed the secrets you trusted her with, which earned her a chuckle from her boy crush who has already started a rumour about you before.

Big Matthew is at the gym for more hours than you've seen him at work so you wonder how he's been able to afford all that workout gear & protein isolate powder.

He'll stop at nothing until the roids make his body look like a popped corn kernel and give him erectile dysfunction.

Chungha dropped a small deposit for nsfw Wangxian fanart she commissioned for her favorite illustrator on Tumblr.

When the drawing is done and she gets the LQ pic, she will take a screenshot and trace over it herself so she doesn't have to pay the rest of the commission.

Lucas moans his own name during sex. Today he pulled out and came everywhere because he orgasmed by looking at his own reflection in the full height closet mirror.

You hope you won't have to see him again, but until then can barely see anything at all with the nut in your eye.