WARNING: THIS POST CONTAINS GRAPHIC AND POTENTIALLY DISTURBING CONTENT. Everyone has bad days. But it’s important to remember that as bad as you think you have it. Others have it worse. And that’s what this thread is about. I am going to tell MY truth. This is my therapy.

If you are courageous and brave enough to post your truth. I will follow you as my way of thanking you. You will feel better after you have gotten all of your demons off your chest. There will be no commenting on any posts. We don’t need thoughts and prayers. This will become

A place for all to rid themselves of what pains them. Any attempt to hijack this will result in #INSTABLOCK regardless of who you are. Only peoples stories are to be on the thread. Do not retweet unless you posted your story. And remember GOD only gives you what he knows you can

Handle. So please follow the rules. Allow this to be a place of healing. To inspire others to feel they can be honest without ridicule or judgement. We lived these truths so we don’t need anyone telling us how they feel about them. I will pin this to allow others to find it.

Here we go. I was born to a mother that wasn’t ready to be a mother. She was 17 when she got pregnant with me. 11 months later my brother was born. We were an inconvenience to her as she had to give up partying with her friends. That didn’t last long though. She locked us in our

Bedroom, and would throw food into the floor for us to eat. We only had 1 bed to share. On the dresser was a fish tank and next to that was a old radio with exposed wires. Which I learned the hard way not to touch. My dad left her shortly after Bobby was born. She rebounded to

A drug dealer. I don’t remember much about him other than he took me to a creek and taught me to shoot his gun. Around this time I was either 4 years old or about to be. On the way home from shooting we seen a dead squirrel. My mother tried to explain death that day. Death is

Forever. But what does forever mean to a 4 year old. What does a gun mean to a 4 year old. Who goes home and watches Elmer Fudd chase Daffy Duck with his shotgun. Blasts him in the face, his bill spins 20 times he reaches up and pulls it back down and keeps talking. So one day as

My mother was passed out on the couch. Sleeping off what ever drugs she was doing earlier. We broke out of our room. It was locked with one of them fish hook locks. I found his gun in a shoebox in the bottom drawer of their dresser. What happened next is a blur. I pulled the

Trigger and shot Bobby in the chest. I remember my mother wake up screaming as my brother laid on the floor dying. I remember the blood pooling under him. I remember the police and fire trucks. I remember the ride to the police station. I remember the police questioning me. Then

They took me to a hospital and placed me on the psych ward. I stayed there 13 months while my parents fought over my custody. From there I went to a cottage for children. I only remember 2 things. Having nightmares and watching the wizard of oz. which also caused nightmares. By

Now my dad had remarried to another young woman. She had just turned 18 and thought she was ready to be a mother to me. She had no way of knowing that I had developed severe emotional damage. I was now 7 and I remember the day she wanted to adopt me and the judge asking me if I

Knew what court was. I said it’s the place where guys stand up and say “ I object “. I remember everyone laughing. The laughter ended pretty fast. She was a very lazy person and treated me as her own personal slave. I had enough and ran away frequently. After a few years of that

They had me committed again. First to a place in Oakland CA. I was there 6 months. It was a large psych floor. I was 9 now and I was in there with other kids and everything in between upto elderly men. They would give my cigarettes and I would be smoking when my dad came to

Visit. I thought I was the coolest guy there. I would get in fights with the elderly patients. One day I went to one of the younger patients room. He was hanging from some light fixture. I alerted staff and they were able to save his life. Then they moved me to Napa State Hosp

Where the real horrors started. I quickly learned that the staff was NOT there to help and keep us safe. On the children’s side it went from 10 to 17. Sexual assaults were a nightly occurrence. And no one was safe from it. Most of the kids were heavily sedated. And they would

Save their pills up and trade them. One day one of the kids gave me 200 mg of thorazine. Right before lunch. We had to line up afterwards before we were led back to our unit. I fell out of line and could barely keep my eyes open. I recall the paramedics slapping me to keep me

Awake. Didn’t work. I hear they pumped my stomach but don’t remember it. After 2 long years there I went to a group home. Where I learned to do more bad things. This is where the experiments with drugs started. You name it I did it. With the exception of Herion. I was smart

Enough to know there was no coming back from that. I was there 2 more years. Once I turned 15 I went home to my dad who was on his third wife. By now I had developed a hatred for females in authority positions. She never stood a chance. I put her through hell. Once I turned 18

She kicked me out of the house and I was homeless. That first night was very cold and raining. I was completely lost now. I had no idea how I would survive. I learned I could goto hotels and eat the free breakfasts as long as I dressed nice. I would then panhandle until I could

Afford dinner. This was my routine for a year. Then I made the smartest choice of my life. I joined the Army. It literally saved my life. I needed the discipline, the brotherhood, the focus on team building. It was rough at first as I hated being told what to do. But over time

I embraced the military. I appreciated the history of it. It tought me honor. To respect women above me and to give them a chance before outright hating them just because they were women. When my time was up my biggest regret was not re-enlisting. I was very immature. When I went

Home I made more bad choices as I fell back in with bad influences I knew before. And before I knew it I was back using drugs and homeless again. This was my life until I turned 30. Then I met my wife. July 9th will be our 20 year anniversary. She truly saved my life. We adopted

7 kids out of foster care and I live a truly blessed life. But none of these blessings I have now would have happened if I had not gone through hell first. I found god after blaming him for all my pain. He was by my side the whole time. As bad as it may seem. It could be worse.