I'm mainly focused on amplifying other voices that need to be heard during these events. That said, I'm also taking time to articulate my thoughts and my reflections on my admittedly highly privileged life thus far on paper.

I hope we can all look inwards to be better outwards.

I really do urge every person to really look back and think about their life, and to think about ALL of the history behind these events, and empathize with why this has been ramping up to this point.

I've always known about all kinds of privileges I've been gifted in life, but I've never lived the opposite.

I remember watching my childhood neighbourhood transform from a mainly immigrant, low-income area into one of the trendiest places in the city, and the effects of that.

I remember my parents working their way up in their jobs to provide me with a private education, but I also realize the shell that that life automatically put me in.

I remember what we were told about a surrounding neighbourhood, one that is still struggling.

I remember a neighbouring school to mine and the reputation it had. Students were predominantly minorities. There were two incidents that instilled a belief that those kids were kids to be avoided.

However, I also remember coming home from a weekend trip with my grade to be pulled into a room and informed a group of students in another grade had been operating a study group that turned into an antisemitic cyberbullying group aimed at a group of women at a sister school.

Some were expelled, some suspended. I can't confirm, but the donor families were those whose sons were suspended, while others were parents of expelled kids.

Many grew up to manage our money, prosecute and defend in court, and hold other positions of power in our society.

I can remember a man at a party in university *proclaiming* that his town "got their first n****r", with many, many people of color attending. Thankfully there was a calm conversation that ensued, but it was one of those "that wasn't the first time you said that" kind of moments.

I also remember the beginnings of isolating myself in those years. I began hearing about "truth-seekers" as an outcropping of the "YouTube Atheist" movement in the late 2000's. I'm an example of someone feeling lost and small, and finding solutions in the wrong places.

From Thunderf00t's "Why Do People Laugh At Creationists" series, to Pat Condell, the snake oil of hatred can start with the lightest of jokes. Joke after joke after joke can lead to a feeling of supremacy, so long as you feel that you are impervious.

It became "Maybe immigration *IS* bad. Maybe they're taking a job *I* could have? Maybe liberals, women, and minorities *are* delusional."

Bred out of insecurity, I had a bubble that led me to believe I would be powerful, and not being so was impossible. The fault of others.

But thankfully, I began to realize that in the real world, and in the city I grew up in, people of all varieties can and do work together, and when they do, it's wonderful.

There are clear issues we need to reflect on, but we should all be on the damn same side.

The Coronavirus, the response to these protests, the violence, the literal attacks on the media, all have laid out just how lost so many of us are, and how deep so many have gone. The pain, frustration and anger on one hand, and the brutish, corrupt, misguided power on the other.

I guess my overall point is that we, especially those of privilege, should all reflect on the actual mechanisms in society that can push people aside, push others to fringes, and try to find ways to rectify these issues.

While these thoughts and experiences have percolated for well over a decade, these last few days have galvanized them. Piecing together the puzzle so that I can be as informed and aware as I can be.

These mechanisms are real, they are pervasive, and need to be brought to light.