Thread by @samkebusiness, Kulomunye umnyaka when l was young&wise ngisaze mazweni...I liked two zkelemu at [...]

Kulomunye umnyaka when l was young&wise ngisaze mazweni...I liked two zkelemu at the same damn time.

. Ngangikwazi ukuthi ngichoose wuphi so sathane took over https://twitter.com/samkebusiness/status/1266812021401620480

https://twitter.com/samkebusiness/status/1266812021401620480

Ngasuka koBulawayo ngisiya phetsheya ukuthi ngiyefunda.Ngangilomfana wami bantu,INdebele qho owayengithanda njalo ethanda uMdali. Sapromisana ukuthi uzalandela..Ohooo bufebe had not kicked in. Mina fikiyani emazweni,usathane wemazweni wangingena ngingananzeleli

Ah phela mina ngisiya emazweni,mina loJesu sasingamabesties. Ngangihlala enyaweni zakhe. Fikiyani ngale. Ngingena esontweni,ngiholy bantu.Angihluphani lomuntu,ngizidingela iNkosi lamabhuku

. Ngelinye ilanga,usathane wathi hamba uyethenga ukudla emashops.

Nangu umuntu esiya emagrocer. Ngisathi ngiyacrosser umgwaqo ukuthi ngingene e shopping centre, ngazwa ingoma iduma, ngokuthanda iHip Hop mina

ngathi let me check ukuthi ngubani okhalisa iradio..kanti uswine lomngane wakhe babone kudala iyellow bhobhoza.

Ngagijima kuATM,ngazama ukuthi ngithathe imali fast fast ngoba sengibone ukuthi oswine babuya ku ATM labo. Angithi ngangiholy so l didnt want to chat with boys and ngilomfana wami osele koBulawayo. Ngithathe imali,ngingene koFish&Chips to buy food. Nampo oswine bebuya labo

So ufakheni wazi introducer,wangibuza ukuthi ngivela kuphi ilizwe. Ngathi koBulawayo,ngilindebele. Wathaba laye wangikhulumisa ngesiNdebele. KwabayiNdebele Reunion

. Wacela inumber yami,ngisathi ngifuna ukuqamba amanga wathi girl you are holding your phone,I'll call your no now

Mina wuuuu

l give him my number. But ubhudi muhle phela and uyicharmer,gadamn it

so ngaziduduza ukuthi amaNdebele malutshwana so we must stick together

. Bufebe spirit ngeniyani. Yaqala inkathazo empilweni yami

Ah ufakheni angifonele waya waya engiconfuser nje, mina uboyfriend back home laye nje ngangimtshele ukuthi he shldnt worry about me meeting someone overseas ngoba l was determined to make our long distance rlship to work...Ohooo

. Manje iNdebele Reunion yayifuna iface to face

So l had an ex l dated for five years or so laye wayeku same cowntry but sasikumadifferent states...nangu laye efona esithi ulomngane wakhe that he has told about me okusame city lami to look after me.Mina okay no problem. Zhlobo,the friend calls me and we arrange to meet

Lina the man was

. A rugby player,intelligent guy..Phela l was once pretty so laye uRugby player usebone iyellow bhobhoza laye sefuna. Sokule child of God back home, ufakheni loRugby player. Ah phambili uboyfriend laye usepicke ukuthi iattention yami asiyekho sharp..

Ah trying to juggle three niggas is the pits

. So mina ngathi kungcono ngidroppe uChild of God. Lina ngaqamba amanga ngathi l need time with uMdali to find myself

. Liyazini angisoli when l get dribbled. Paying for my sins...So ngatshiyana lo long distance. One down

Sengisele loFakheni&Rugby player manje. Ufakheni was very charming& handsome. Vele wayesenza igazi ligijime. Wuuu angizake ngikubone lokhwana

.Liyakhumbula ukuthi l was holy,lowu wangenza ngavela ngalahla iBhayibheli loJesu konke ebin

...uRugby player.......

Asambeni siyelala.

Angithi ngilitshelile ukuthi uFakheni wayengiyenza ngiphambane ikhanda.l think usathane wayebona vele ukuthi ah lapha kusele udokoza nje

. Ngifile ukufa,umuntu engakangibambi nje. Ngingusisi wamatongues,ngiyaleader intercession. Usisi ohlala emadolweni

Mina ngizenza oholy ngathi kwelinye ilanga kuFakheni asambe sonke esontweni,mina ngingumuntu kaMlimu...Heyi ufakheni wayeyidla life yakhe wena,wayehamba out and enatha. Wapromiser ukuthi uzahamba lami ngoba he had to impress me

.ubulima bami. Sunday l got ready

So savumelana ukuthi uzangipicker from my place sihambe sonke. Sunday ubhudi wavukela khona,wayesephandle ekuseni. Ibhabhalazi lalimuqede...But his smile nje my goodness made me forget

. Nanko sisiya esontweni. Ngiyakhumbula uMamfu esmiler singena echurch

Ah manje lelo langa, yellow bhobhoza nguye owaye leader i intercession...ngafaka ubufebe eceleni,ngakhonza uMdali...kwabamnandi. Sakholisa loFakheni...it was my bday futhi...Ah uRugby player laye phela ulokhu esaphila

. Usathane limesabe shame. Bufebe must fall

Rugby player is what we call the man's man. The body

,the voice hallelujah.He was Shona..The conversations were lit. Kodwa yeyi..Laye to impress the girl,wathi ufuna ukuhamba lami esontweni..Hawu

. Mina okay sizahamba. Kodwa shuwa lina ngangihambe lomunye echurch.....

Ah okwami kunzima..Nanko ke sahlangana echurch. Bantu,this man shuwa he must forgive me anyway so angithi nga introducer ufakheni eChurch to everyone loMamfu. Manje uRugby ngizathi ungubani

. Mina ngabengisithi ngumngane wami odinga iNkosi ufuna isalvation

Ngubani owayengangisola shuwa umam intercessor

. Ah kwabamnandi leRugby player efuna isindiso. Inhlanhla nje yikuthi mina lofakheni sasihlala kumasame areas but uRugby player on the other side kwedolobho. Saqhuba nje kwamnandi. Ubuwule so.

UFakheni ngangimtshelile ukuthi uRugby player uyangifuna,then ngatshela uRugby player ukuthi uFakheni uyangifuna

.. Ungangibuzi why. Ah manje ngelinye ilanga ngabe ngithaba kakhulu. Mina labangane bami sabesitshaya sisiya kuFriday night shopping. Zazikhupha phela ngale

So ngangivumelane loRugby player ukuthi sizohlangana after my shopping with Girls. OkuFakheni kumbe kwakuthunywe ngusathane,wabengifonela esithi he will wait for me outside the house...Wuuuuu,ngavela ngawoma qha

. Phela uFakheni l cldnt say no to him.

Angazi ukuthi why ngangiphambana ikhanda soyana,angizake ngiphambane soyana. Mina ngathi sharp sizobonana

..Manje ngilamagirls abasale fear the Lord so ukuthi ngibatshele ngobufebe bami ukuthi bangincedise,akuvumi. Mina zwi...ngilwe lemicabango. Angithi l chose this life

Ah ngabengisithi kumagirls mina ngizalilandela endlini mina kumele ngibone someone. Ngahlangana loRugby player.Ngakhuluma loRugby but vele okuFakheni sokulokhu kungifonela

. Sasiplanne loRugby ukuthi we will chill for sometime since l saw him ngamaweekends ngoba wayesebenza

UFakheni usebusy ngokungibuza ukuthi ngifika nini endlini. Ah mina too late,ngabe ngitshela uRugby player ukuthi kumele ngiye endlini ngoba ngile morning shift. Bantu,wabaleconfusion

. Umfana wayezame but usisi usecabanga phambili. Wathi ngikuhambise endlini

Mina wuuu the devil is a liar,ngathi no dont worry baby.Ngiwumana. I got on the bus and felt the bus wasn't moving. Got home and Fakheni was there waiting for me

. Lingangibuzi ukuthi ngaqamba amanga ukuthi why ngasengihamba ngedwa and with no girls

Life continued but if we had to write everything that transpired,Twitter will not be able to contain.
Rugby player married another lady and he wld call yellow bhobhoza to tell her how he wanted to marry her. Rugby player told his mum about the Ndebele yellow.

Fakheni dribbled the yellow bhobhoza to come nice. Years of dribbling.

If you live by dribbling,you die by dribbling.

Thank you for your ears

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