Someone told my parenting group that their 13 year old nephew asked, "Is it wrong that I'm thankful I'm white?"

This is uncomfortable to hear but I was very encouraged. Here's why:

This white teen is empathizing with black pain, he sees color, he sees the inequality and injustice. He knows his white privilege.

What's important is what comes next.

Moving from guilt to anti racist action is the key step white people need to take, over and over again. So it's time to help this 13 year old take it so he can have this skill for the long fight against racial inequality.

Validate feelings. If you tell him he can't feel that way, he'll just feel it any way but never tell anyone. Silence will turn to resentment and eventually to weaponizing whiteness.

"You're not wrong to feel those feelings, but let me help you move through those feelings and then work together with you for anti racism. I feel those feelings too. Let's learn and grow together."