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Last night, I mentioned that the George Floyd police murder relates to deep problems with masculinity. American racism and traditional masculinity are hopelessly entwined.
When I was writing my new book about boys and men, I really wanted to avoid the topic of race altogether because I wanted to make it about *one* thing, how to give advice to my son (and myself) about becoming a better man.
The problem was, as soon as I started looking into *why* American masculinity - and here I'm talking specifically about *white* masculinity - is so troubled, it became impossible to overlook the fundamental truth of racism.
That's because traditional masculinity and racism are at the root of our historical power structures. Both seek to create and maintain a social hierarchy. Men above women, white men above all others.
As those power structures have begun to slooooowly fray, we've seen some men - and some white women who benefit from the status quo - react with alarm. They've become more entrenched in debilitating behaviors.
I don't know what police training is like, but I know that the police are are the front soldiers in protecting the status quo. That's why they can stand idly by as white protestors scream in their faces with guns at their side but murder an unarmed black man.
Not because any of the police officers is *racist* in the sense that they might hold personal racist beliefs, but the design of the power structure, as represented by the police, is inherently racist as long as it's inherently built to maintain our poisonous social contract.
"To protect and serve" who exactly? "To protect and serve" what? I don't think any reasonable one of us could argue that the answers to those questions apply to all Americans equally.
Think about traditional police behavior. Their swagger. Their general political leanings. Even their uniforms. All traditionally masculine. We take it for granted. But why would that be so? Protection is a traditionally masculine sentiment, but service is traditionally feminine.
To protect and serve is to combine the best traditions of both genders. (I would argue that these are outmoded gender traditions elsewhere.) Yet that's not how the police typically operate, particularly when it comes to black communities. Why?
Because, again, the police exist to defend traditional power structures, which are built on white male supremacy. We can't decouple one from the other. Until we do, we're going to have more George Floyds.
And, shit, I might as well plug my book, which goes more deeply into all of this and more. It comes out in September and it's called A BETTER MAN. Pre-order from your favorite local bookseller or here. https://www.amazon.com/Better-Man-Letter-My-Son/dp/1616209119
Just an aside - as always when discussing issues of masculinity - the people engaging with this thread are mostly female. It's a bummer because (white) men are the ones who need to engage on this topic.
