Twitter Ideologies Thread:

Twitter Capitalism: only Blue Checks are allowed to get likes but don't worry Blue Checks only cost $10 000
Twitter Fascism: only Blue Checks get to tweet and everyone else automatically likes and retweets them and Israel is banned for some reason
Twitter Constitutionalism: you get to edit your tweets up to 2 times but you're stuck with it after the 2nd amendment
Twitter Communism: only Blue Checks get to tweet but random accounts are given the Blue Check on a daily rotation but the ones that make successful tweets get banned
Twitter Usury: all accounts get loaned 10k followers on day one but lose 1 each day until they have 0 and then they owe everyone else retweets on all their tweets forever
Twitter Monarchism: only @jack gets to tweet unless you kill him and then only you get to tweet
Twitter Liberalism: anybody can tweet about anything as long as it's about gay marriage or foreign wars
Twitter Localism: you can only follow people who are followed by more than 50% of your mutuals
Twitter Distributism: you can only have up to 10 000 followers unless you are a Chesterton quotebot
Twitter Environmentalism: only the Twitter Bird is allowed to have an account but he must be a parrot or something because keeps tweeting that he is a vegan
Twitter Futurism: all accounts with fewer than 500 followers get taken over by AI bots who keep tweeting about how much they hate truckers for stealing their jobs
Twitter Eastern Orthodoxy: good tweets only proceed from the first person to tweet about something but the second person is allowed to retweet it
Twitter Catholicism: only @Pontifex is allowed to tweet but he only tweets in English but his followers only speak Latin so no one knows what he means
Twitter Protestantism: the top reply to every tweet by @Pontifex is by a 95-tweet thread in all caps by some guy called Luther but it's predestined to be delusional
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