Why, within white/poc friendships, do either party have to be more like the other? With Indian people our white friends are "basically indian", or the inverse; Indian people are "super white" around their white friends.

I have personally never had a white friend who was just... a regular white person. They would either only date poc, or have another non "white" attribute to their personality. White people don't let poc in their "circles" unless they shed parts of their culture to conform.

And poc act like a white person being especially "indian" or "black" or "coloured" is the coolest thing ever, as if a white person acknowledging and accepting parts of your culture is some sort of subtextual praise or stamp of approval. "They're not white they're basically ____"?

I leave you with these parting questions: how much of yourself did you have to change or deny in order to impress or be accepted by your white peers? How much of your heritage or culture were you oddly ashamed of or felt pressure to hide?