Kiritsugu, a testament to the endless cycle of war

[A thread on Emiya Kiritsugu]

Kiritsugu is one of the most heartbreaking tragic heroes in anime and a character driven by the horrors that he went through and the regrets that he feels. I'll examine Kiritsugu's character, psyche, and how he's used to expose the themes that F/z tackles.

First off, the overarching theme of Fate zero is to be balanced in your way of thinking and how you perceive the world, as well as the conflicts that you go through. In other words, don't look at the world from an overly idealistic POV, or an overly realistic POV. Otherwise,

you'll suffer from the consequences of the decisions you make based on that idealistic/realistic way of thinking. This theme is communicated through the bloody and hopeless journey of Kiritsugu that's brimming with despair and agony, which I'll now expand on.

Kiritsugu is, simply put, an emotionally bankrupt man in a constant state of fear, depression, and agony as he clings to a self destructive ideology out of guilt and a sense of duty, who was once a happy, idealistic, and innocent kid that dreamed of becoming a hero to prevent

catastrophes that happened to him from happening to other people, but was betrayed by the cruel reality, causing him to despair and forcing him to embrace the cruel reality, resulting in him forsaking his emotions and striving for his ideal world based on his utilitarianistic

ideology. In other words, Kiritsugu carries all the evils in this world on his back, as well as his pain, as he strives for his ideal world all alone, because he doesn't want anyone to suffer and carry his burdens with him, as he thinks that only he alone should carry that out of

selflessness, as well as the fact that he dreads causing someone's death just by sticking to what he believes in. Kiritsugu wants to be alone in his journey because any people dying because of him would cause him pain and would be unnecessary sacrifices, just like Shirley's

death, but at the same time, Kiritsugu needs love, compassion, and comfort. He needs someone to love him, resulting in this beautiful and human contradiction in him.Kiritsugu wants to be an emotionless machine in his journey, but his emotions are dragging him down, causing him

even more pain. Kiritsugu dreads failing his quest of world peace, because if he does, all of the lives he sacrificed, including his loved ones, the emotions he casted aside, all would be in vain, resulting in his endless despair to amount to nothing, which is why he thinks that

he saved himself by saving Shirou alone. I'd also like to add that the reason he dreads failing is because if he does, it'd be the equivalent of failing his mother figure Natalia and Shirley, as well as becoming something similar to his dad, someone who he despised and killed

emotionlessly. He knows deep down that he will become what he hated and what drove him into this diplorable journey of sadness if he fails, which is why he's in a constant state of fear and agony. Kiritsugu is devoid of any sense of honor and pride because he doesn't see any kind

honor in what he does. He hates what he does, he thinks war is nothing short of unspeakable despair, but he has to use any tools at his disposal to get closer to his impossible dream, adding a ginormous amount of guilt on his shoulders that he has to bear through, because he

thinks that's the only way he can hope to achieve peace. Kiritsugu believes that it's impossible to save someone without sacrificing another, so, when put in a critical situation, Kiritsugu will always choose the majority over the minority. But why does he think so? What drove

What drove him to that extent? The best place I can start with is obviously his origins. Growing up, Kiritsugu had a habit of taking responsibility for his actions that he indirectly/directly caused, as well as having a strong and self destructive sense of justice that would lead

him to kill his father, berate himself for his friend's death, and shouldering all the pain and agony of seeing the village he grew up in be burned down to the ground. This is tragic because when Kiritsugu decides to take the gun and shoot his father, he remembered Shirley's

question to him and what he's going to become in the future. He decided that he would become a killer and forsake his emotions. In that moment, Kiritsugu subconsciously decides that killing one person to save many is the best alternative. Kiritsugu killed his dad because his dad

was going to continue his research somewhere else, causing him to experiment on other people, leading him to kill many more. Kiritsugu believed that killing him, the minority, would save the majority, whoever he was going to kill in the future. A good small detail is that when

Nataliya asks Kiritsugu if there's anything that he wants to take with him when they leave his island, he says that there's nothing to take, signifying that Kiritsugu thinks he lost everything that he cherished that night. Another good small detail is that Kiritsugu asks

Another good small detail is that Kiritsugu asks Nataliya if she's a good person, because if Kiritsugu is going to stay with someone after he lost everything that he cherished, he wants to at least make sure that she's a good person, as well as just wanting to be comforted and

shown sympathy, while also hiding that desire. Upon losing everything, a grieving Kiritsugu decides to take Nataliya's path and become a hunter to prevent catastrophes that happened to him from happening to other people, while also striving for his dream based on his idealogy.

As Kiritsugu spends more time with Nataliya, he realizes that his goal isn't as simple as he thought. He did think that it was impossible to save everyone, but he did want to save as many people as possible. He thought he could do that without killing too many, so when he sees

many people dying in front of him, people he could've saved, he questions his decision to kill his father and whether it had meaning to it or not, because he's, deep down, losing hope and slowly realizing that he has to dirty his hands more.