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There is an interesting difference between being a visible minority and being of a marginalized identity but appearing white.
Before I adopted hijab, I was treated by society as any other WW. Overall, public interactions were easy to navigate. Privilege makes life so easy.
Before I adopted hijab, I was treated by society as any other WW. Overall, public interactions were easy to navigate. Privilege makes life so easy.
If I did something wrong or broke a rule or had an expired ID at the post office... I could play innocent/ignorant and I’d get the “remember this for next time” warning and get what I wanted anyways.
Life on easy mode. No joke.
Life on easy mode. No joke.
As people got to know me better, I found some would probe me for “evidence of Jewishness”. As they noticed I didn’t eat pork, as I requested Saturday off the work schedule etc.
I would nervously shrug off questions and give them nothing. I knew from experience how people change.
I would nervously shrug off questions and give them nothing. I knew from experience how people change.
When I converted to Islam, a few “friends” knew but that was a limited circle. Some dropped our friendship outright, others felt compelled to tell me about their Muslim cousin/neighbour/real estate agent... everyone that knew changed the dynamic with me in some way.
That was nothing, however, compared to the shift once I covered my hair.
Everyone changed. Friends, strangers, and even the two family members who had stayed in contact with me after I had “left” the family and been disowned a decade and a half before.
Everyone changed. Friends, strangers, and even the two family members who had stayed in contact with me after I had “left” the family and been disowned a decade and a half before.
The power of “I didn’t know/realize” evaporated. Now the rules were strictly enforced, there was no excuse.
Not only that, my opinions and ideas devalued to a frustrating degree. I no longer had the same standing in any conversation - no matter the subject.
Not only that, my opinions and ideas devalued to a frustrating degree. I no longer had the same standing in any conversation - no matter the subject.
My work was devalued as well... I made half as much as I used to in salary with MORE experience under my belt.
Let me tell you how absolutely wild it is to experience this shift. It changed the way I look at everyone and everything, and I do thank Allah swt for opening my eyes.
Let me tell you how absolutely wild it is to experience this shift. It changed the way I look at everyone and everything, and I do thank Allah swt for opening my eyes.
I still have so much privilege over any brown or Black hijabis. But these days I read and listen and amplify those voices in ways I was not in the past.
I am more aware of the small, subtle ways that racism affects people around me instead of only seeing it in the big events.
I am more aware of the small, subtle ways that racism affects people around me instead of only seeing it in the big events.
It is a conscious choice and effort to point out microagressions, to take the floor in order to cede it to someone who is being overlooked, and to treat the casual disrespect of everyday racism with as much disgust as an obvious infraction.
My behaviour has cost me several jobs.
My behaviour has cost me several jobs.
The work is every single day and it will sting as you find yourself feeling more powerless than anything you have experienced in your privileged life...
But the work needs to be done.
But the work needs to be done.
Let’s not trade the lives and dignity of our family in humanity for a little dunya. We won’t be able to put an end to these big, horrific events until we address all the little ones.
White & white-passing... we MUST do this work.
Break decorum. Be uncomfortable. Take the losses.
White & white-passing... we MUST do this work.
Break decorum. Be uncomfortable. Take the losses.
PS
White Arabs are white.
White Jews are white.
We have white privilege.
We need to do the work.
(Yes, our lives are complicated but we KNOW it’s not the same.)
White Arabs are white.
White Jews are white.
We have white privilege.
We need to do the work.
(Yes, our lives are complicated but we KNOW it’s not the same.)