1/ I've been struggling to find just the right way to mock the whiny, entitlement-soaked snots at @fairnessalberta regarding their tear-soaked pleading for the rest of Canada to step up and dig them out of their fiscal predicament, and I think I've found it, so work with me.

2/ Imagine, if you will, a very well-off relative -- fancy house in a gated community, 4-car garage, outdoor pool, kids attending a hoity-toity private school down the road ... you know, living in the lap of luxury ...

3/ ... and then something goes wrong ... business collapse perhaps, financial calamity, struggling to pay the bills, so they turn to relatives, explaining their predicament and begging for financial assistance to stay afloat. (Sound familiar?)

4/ The (less well-off) relatives want to help, but the first obvious question any of them should ask is, "OK, what have you done so far?" That is, they want to know what steps have *already* been taken to salvage the situation, and this is where things could get ugly.

5/ "OK," the relatives ask, "first thing you need to do, of course, is to cut back on expenses, so we assume you've stopped eating out five times a week, right?"

"Well, no, those dinners are part of our routine, we couldn't just stop."

6/ "Um, all right, well, you have two Porsches, a Bentley and a Range Rover ... we assume you're putting some of those on the market, right?"

"Oh, we couldn't *imagine* doing that, we love those cars dearly, they're like part of the family!"

7/ "Uh, OK, getting a bit weird here ... your kids are in a private school whose tuition is $25,000 a year for each of them ... seems pretty clear you need to get them out of there and send them to public school."

"Oh, dear, they *love* that school, they'd be heartbroken!"

8/ I think you see where this is going: "We need help ... we've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas!"

Welcome to Alberta, who have tried nothing and are all out of ideas. And how does this play out?

9/ "Well, let's see, you *could* have been charging reasonable royalties for all that oil all these years."

"Oh, no, the oil companies wouldn't have liked that, they said as much."

10/ "Uh, all right, well, you *could* stop giving those companies billions in handouts that just go to enrich their CEOs and shareholders."

"Oh, dear me, no, they *definitely* wouldn't like that, no, that's out of the question!"

11/ "Well, how about not cutting corporate taxes every year? That would get you a ton of revenue. Have you tried that?"

"Good Lord, do you have any idea how upset those corporations would be!?!?"

12/ "Fine ... then what about a simple provincial sales tax, like everyone else does? Can you at least do *that?"

"Heavens to Betsy, this is Alberta ... we don't pay sales tax!"

Have I made my point?

The end.