Thread by @Annie_Wu_22, Growing up as an adopted Asian American, I've always found difficulty making [...]

Growing up as an adopted Asian American, I've always found difficulty making sense of my identity.

As #APAHM

comes to a close, here is my attempt to articulate just that and what I’m doing about it – a thread.

#AAPI

#AAPIHM

@TwitterAsians #AsianPacificAmericanHeritageMonth

Growing up as an adopted Asian American, I've always found difficulty making sense of my identity. As #APAHM comes to a close, here is my attempt to articulate just that and what I’m doing about it – a thread. #AAPI #AAPIHM @TwitterAsians #AsianPacificAmericanHeritageMonth

My name is Annie. A lot of people assume Wu is my last name when they find me on social media since it's @Annie_Wu_22.

My last name is actually Henry, which is the last name of my adoptive family. They chose to incorporate my Chinese last name as my middle name.

I was adopted as a baby and haven't been back to Asia since. I was adopted into a white family in a VERY white town.

Growing up, I never felt different – even though I was usually one of the only non-white children. In fact, I don't even think I realized this most of the time.

Culturally I was brought up to be, what many call "American" – in actuality, they mean white.

My family thinks mild chicken wings are "too spicy" and calamari is "exotic." We go to Sunday church and have a literal white picket fence. I was taught to "not see color."

I always knew I was different; in fact I even made stereotypical jokes: I’m bad at painting nails lol !

But being constantly surrounded by a support system that treated me so "color-blindly" shielded me to the real fact that I'll never be the same as a white person in America.

There were copious microaggressions, but I didn't understand their weight at the time.

Oftentimes I tended to minimize or laugh off anti-Asian racism. I made excuses like “it wasn’t meant to be offensive” or “racism against Asians doesn’t exist here.”

(Excuse the 2010 quality)

BUT I do remember my first encounter with blatant, unequivocal racism.

It wasn't until I was 19. It was a man yelling in a grocery store parking lot.

I'm sure any minority remembers theirs too.

After that, I think I subconsciously changed.

I began noticing more: inequalities, underrepresentation, microaggressions, oppression.

I felt more: anger, sadness, and absolute dismay when other people didn't "get it"

(it prob didn't help I was studying media + politics)

Trying to understand my privilege and identity has been confusing and conflicting.

While I will never pass as white, declaring that I am a POC feels fraudulent since I have not experienced the same oppression as people in the Black and brown communities.

I am well aware that my identity grants me both privileges and disadvantages.

I try to educate others about the historic and present Asian racial injustices while empathizing with the struggles of other POC groups as a fellow minority.

It's a balance & I am always learning.

As one of the most underrepresented groups in mainstream media, I will always advocate for more non-token Asian visibility.

I often wonder if I had seen more dolls, teachers, singers, actresses & people in power that looked like me, if I would have found Asian pride earlier.

When speaking about the impact of @CrazyRichMovie, @awkwafina nailed it when she said “you don't realize how important [representation] is until you realize you have been missing it your whole life.”

I felt that.

& I've embraced that.

(had some fun w recent Halloween costumes)

I'm quite honestly embarrassed to say that I never really celebrated #APAHM

before. I think I was so afraid of letting my race define me, that I suppressed my pride in the process.

I was so focused on "being equal" that I played right into the systematic racism in this country.

I'm quite honestly embarrassed to say that I never really celebrated #APAHM before. I think I was so afraid of letting my race define me, that I suppressed my pride in the process.I was so focused on "being equal" that I played right into the systematic racism in this country.

Reading other Asian-American stories online, mine is far from unique. And that’s a problem.

It shouldn’t take rejection from the white community to spark solidarity with another.