(non-political/non-sports tweet)

Dating has been very difficult for me all my life.
The stereotype is that all men are dogs or stupid and cheat on their women
Well i definitely appear to be stupid (a gullible sap)
Women can deceive men too
It doesn't matter if their homely & fat

If you buy their stories of why they won't meet they're seeing another dude.
With a lack of options I basically have no choice but to trust women with some caveats just to get somewhere

Im very picky, introverted also like shy introverted girls who mostly stay in but when going out its like to the park or something simple and a small circle of friends tops.

The internet is the ONLY thing that has worked for me since high school... except it hasn't worked because its a place where people can make superficial relationships so I need to meet women IRL so they don't play games
But there are several other problems

I resent going out to typically dating spots but ive found NO ATTRACTION to women even at the park, even stores because I dont share common interests of mainstream culture to start a conversation
I have no regular friends...
A more plausible option at work is all male lately

For years I've desired female companionship to get back what i loss in 2010 and still do but im starting to feel more asexual as i get older thought I know its not true.

Even if successful it would take years to build chemistry, comfort and a psychological bond.
Im 36 in August

I could try not looking or caring but it never falls in my lap, I have to look but nothing i do works, i have no spirit, trust belief in this anymore.
I'm not looking for love and feelings
Just companionship of someone for me because. Im for her.
I want to be her #1 not fallback

Even my one and only exgf who dated me for 16 months i believe i was a rebound guy the whole time.

I know if i found her i would be very devoted to her like almost no other.

But im beginning to thing (GOD) is telling me im meant to be a single bachelor forever

And think about it, a lot of people live their whole life single, never married no children and little to no sexual partners.
That is all true for me plus no social life
If i followed #QuarentineLife it would be no Change for me.

This thread doesn't explain everything but a lot to give you an idea about my frustrations in life.
Trying to stay sane.
(Girl/social) issues aren't the only ones but a good 60%.
Job/income/living situation is part of the other 40%
IDT ppl will read or reply to this so WTP?