Since the only SexEd we got from our parents was “avoid boys so you don’t get pregnant.” I hope we do better for our own kids. I’ll share a few things I think the SexEd talk should be about.
- Virginity is a social construct
- Ask for consent
- Drunk people cannot give consent
-Lube is great
- Movie sex is staged
- There’s nothing wrong with NOT wanting to have sex
- Your body belongs to you, not society, religion or some hypothetical future partner.
- Your sexual health is your responsibility, and should be prioritized over people’s wants or needs
- Do not let anybody shame you for buying contraceptives or condoms
- Body count is as useless as the P in “psyche”
- There is nothing shameful or unclean about periods
- Body parts come in different shapes, sizes, colors and textures. All bodies are valid and beautiful.
-Saggy breasts, stretchmarks, thigh gaps, cellulite, varicose veins are normal, not ugly or a sign of promiscuity.
-Body hair is normal and not ‘masculine’
-Abuse, pressure, manipulation, coercion aren’t love.
-There’s no life long spiritual connection to your ‘first partner’
-Vagina, vulva, urethra &clitoris are all different. There’s no shame in exploring and knowing your body.
-Pedophilea is not a form of sexual orientation. Age of consent is 18yrs
-Minors can’t give consent
-Sex isn’t life. You don’t have to ‘finish’ just cause you’ve started
-Sexual orientations and attractions can change. And that’s okay
-Sexual hygiene is not ‘feminine’ or ‘emasculating’. Everybody should practice it.
-Sexual assault is sexual assault. Gender regardless. Women raping boys doesn’t make them ‘men’.
- Abstinence should be YOUR choice
- Respect people’s sexual boundaries &choices
- You do not ‘owe’ anyone your body, or sex.
-There is nothing shameful about waiting to have sex, or not having sex at all.
- Your sexual orientation is not a morality yardstick for condemning or endorsing other sexual orientations
-You can’t get pregnant by kissing or touching somebody.
- An arm is called an arm. A penis is called a penis. Same with a vagina. Names like ‘lady parts’ and ‘down there’ only propel the shame culture around sex and sexual talk.
-Abortion and masturbations aren’t ‘crimes’
-Sex is for the pleasure of both partners. Your orgasm is your right.
-Your body’ll change, and that is perfectly normal.
-Wet dreams do not indicate partners in the “dream/spirit” world.
-Vaginismus is normal. No, you’re not under any “attack”.
-Sex work is work
-No means no
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