This week of #lockdown is the hardest yet. Feeling squeezed by pressure from all sides. My nights are exhausting. My days are exhausting. There's no respite. The only creative time I get to myself is work. And I get far too little of that to do my job properly.

My total lack of faith in our incompetent, amoral, treacherous government is not helping. Being the only able-bodied adult in a house with an increasingly wriggly, fast-moving proto-toddler is not helping. I'm longing for a date night, a night off, a holiday.

Cooking and gardening with baby on my back are the only self-nourishing activities I get, and my back is killing me. I can't go to Tai Chi class. Kink isn't an option, we don't have a babysitter. I can't get wasted, I'm breastfeeding. None of my usual release valves are available