I've been thinking about the difference between being open to feedback & actually accepting said feedback & then making changes. If I made changes based on everything everyone said to me, my life would be a mess. I listen, but at the end of the day, I choose how to proceed.

I believe strongly in taking ownership of one's choices because at the end of the day, each of us has to live with the consequences of said choices. People will weigh in & carry on. Telling others what they should be doing is easy when you're not the one who has to deal.

There's a lot to learn from others & listening to varied POVs can help us see perspectives we may not have previously considered. Being able to filter through all of it, knowing what to accept & what to chuck is where the work is.
"I hear you. Thank you. Here's what I choose."

It's not always simple. We have to deal with the feelings of those whose recommendations we didn't take. People generally have a hard time understanding that the people they love are allowed to choose different. We get it when we're making our choices, not so much when others are

We want others to respect our autonomy. Can we respect theirs tho? I want to be able to give the people I love recommendations & have them make the changes I want. Do they get to demand the same of me?
"Here's what I think. You get to decide tho, not me. I respect your choice"

So after accepting all the feedback & weighing my options, I can then say "here's what I decided", knowing that the choice was mine. Which is different from "here's what my 'insert person whose opinion matters' told me to do". Also different from "nobody can tell me what to do"

I'm hoping I can get more comfortable with people in my life choosing to not go with my ideas. Allowing them, the way I like to be allowed. Reminding myself that I may be the main character in the story of my life, but I'm not, in theirs. They are. And I should respect that.

And in turn, I can request that of them too. "Thank you. I hear you. Here's what I'm choosing to do". Without feeling like choosing myself means I'm unchoosing them. Mutual allowing. Honoring each person's choices without the need to walk on eggshells cos we have different POVs.