tw: sexual harassment

speaking as an ace person who's not interested in sex at all, i just wanted to talk abt something that's been on my mind

how people (mostly, men) blame women for their dress, their appearance, for the harassment they receive

which is frankly, ridiculous

putting aside morbid examples (you know what i mean, if you've seen the exhibition of survivors' clothes),

it's how the person perceives the dress that's to blame, isn't it?

I've seen so many beautiful people in my life, seen beautiful people wearing revealing clothes—

but I've never felt the urge to catcall or harass anyone. Sure, you can say it's bc I'm a woman, or that I'm ace which is why I don't feel the urge—

but that begs the question: if you bring up that argument, are you calling all men disgusting pigs with no mind for propriety?

women are equally capable of harassment, not just men. but some people argue in particular that "men can't help themselves when shown those things"

so...what? men are inherently, because of their gender, monsters? animals?

that doesn't sound right to me.

ppl are smarter than that. aren't we, supposedly, higher up on the food chain? are we not different from animals bc of our supposed intellect?

why blame instinct? why blame the victim for the MIND that CHOOSES to PERCEIVE things as MALICIOUS to disregard personal responsibility?

I'm ace but I have moments where I choose to wear clothing regarded conventionally as revealing to an extent, but you know and I know that I'm not interested in sex. I don't intend to attract anyone with that— I just like the confidence that comes with feeling sexy.

The feeling of sexiness doesn't come from knowing people are watching. In fact, it irritates and makes me uncomfortable when men do so, or verbally mention it.

It's a different story when my friends and other women praise me. That's something I like and appreciate.

I just wish people would stop talking out of their ass & acting like women (or any person in general) are at fault for wearing "sexy" (& this is questionable, as it's SUBJECTIVE) clothing.

The perception & ACTIONS come from the harasser, not the person wearing the clothes.