there's power and privilege in who can openly state their thoughts; some of us have a lot to lose in an industry that's already leaning against us, and it can be scary and exhausting to say what we think. it's also exhausting to silence ourselves. exhausting to be told...

...to take it to the texts or DMs, as if we can't publicly be ourselves and voice our thoughts. a lot of queer people of color have spent their lives silencing ourselves, hiding ourselves, and being told we're being dramatic, that our hurt feelings...

...are something to be dismissed.

meanwhile, white folks are openly dismissing the hurt of QPOC. they say "you haven't read it yet!" ignoring that when Q/POC had their books on the line, no one had read those books yet, either. why is this suddenly the defense?

tbh, I'm eyeing the silent straight POC allies, too. remember when all of twitter exploded bc some white lady didn't know how to handle her finances? where's that rage now?

it's the constant feeling of betrayal from groups you're supposed to feel welcomed by...

...the people who are supposed to be your friends and community, that is ultimately hurtful and degrading. yeah, we can call it discourse, but beneath it all, that's what I want to focus on: this has been legit hurtful.

and the idea of "professionalism" and whether it's okay to speak about these topics need to be addressed, too. professionalism has always existed to protect white privilege. it sucks that I even have to be nervous saying things as basic as this.

anyway, I said all of this bc keeping it in, and the thought that I had to hide my thoughts and feelings for basically the sake of white privilege, was also hurting me.