forcing myself to try new rendering styles for “improvement” and “artistic growth”

i’ve never done like, traditional artistic studies; every piece i tackle is itself a learning opportunity and i am diving headfirst into a full ass project just to play w rendering

doing studies would be beneficial, i just lack the patience for it. i know what i want to draw and how i want it drawn and it’s difficult for me to stop and take time for practice because my mind sees it as a detour from my ultimate goal

also like, when i take long breaks from drawing, i see instant improvement when i start up again, so that instant gratification means there’s never any motivation for me to improve. i guess maybe during that time, my brain is able to process and learn even when i’m not drawing? -

but if i’m improving by Not drawing, how much more could i improve if i practiced and experimented? pushed myself out of my comfort zone? i feel like i’m doing myself a disservice if i don’t at least try

there’s little point to this thread other than like. sharing my thoughts as a point of reflection, a reminder for myself, and maybe something that someone can relate to lol

also may be a comfort to some to know that sometimes other artists rly do not know what they’re doing and are stupid