Read on Twitter
Hi I’m in the ER because I broke my finger and everything is hilarious and ridiculous.
For instance, the nurse came in and said “which finger do you think is broken?” and I said “the crooked one?”
And then the doctor asked me if there was any chance I was pregnant and I was like “do I reference dead husband or COVID” to reassure him that I, in fact, am not?
Also, I am in a pediatric exam room bc they are using all rooms to maintain social distancing. There is a red fire truck outside my room and a world map that may or may not perpetuate stereotypes.
Me, when the doctor pressed on my finger
It just dawned on me it’s my middle finger so I may be in the position to flip people off “not on purpose”
OK the X-ray technician instructed me to “give her the bird” so this may be a blessing in disguise.
They keep having different people ask me what happened and I’m sure it’s to make sure it isn’t DV. Which is a wonderful thing. But what they don’t realize is that it was DV: dog violence. Thats a bad joke but I really hurt and the dog did break my finger.
My Mom just texted me that the kids are fine and my re-organized kitchen looks fantastic so I have that going for me
Okay the cover just makes me want to push it more
Doctor: How’s your pain?
Me: Sir, are you a telekinetic orphan from the 1980s fighting off a monster from another dimension because my pain is at ELEVEN.
Me: Sir, are you a telekinetic orphan from the 1980s fighting off a monster from another dimension because my pain is at ELEVEN.
Nurse: You must have a high pain tolerance.
Me: If you think this is good, you should see my emotional pain tolerance.
Me: If you think this is good, you should see my emotional pain tolerance.
This chair is male.
I have been looking at this chair too long.
