90 Day Fiancé guys as clients, a thread
Big Ed- asks if your incall is in a safe area. Brings lingerie without asking. Gossips about other providers. Proposes a $3k/month arrangement in which you stay the night 4 days a week.
David- first email has all screening info but says he “wants to be a regular”. Brings flowers. Tells you in person that he found your personal LinkedIn and Facebook. Emails you just to chat, wants to go to dinner off the clock. Wants to know how many other clients you see.
Geoffrey- texts at 2:14am, you wake up to 9 “??” messages followed by a “whatever fat whore, I don’t have to pay”. Doesn’t pass screening, for obvious reasons. Proceeds to text you from burner numbers every few weeks.
Usman- DMs you on IG, thinks that counts as screening. Your rates are too high but he will put you in his next music video for “exposure”. He has fewer followers than you do.
Bonus round! Darcey- books a 3some for her BFs bday even though she is NOT down. Is visibly wine drunk when you show up. Has an absolute meltdown and locks herself in the bathroom. You leave early and her BF asks for your number/website while profusely apologizing.
Ash- his blacklists are ymmv but he seems nice enough right? Gets to your incall and immediately heads to the bathroom ❄️ spends the rest of the date going off the rails about his “life coach” business. Wants to know if you can help him get into the industry.
Tom- you meet him on tinder while he’s traveling for work. Agrees to your rate. Talks a big game over dinner about luxury travel and his fancy job. When you get to the hotel he only has $200 and “can’t take anymore out of the atm”. You loot his minibar and leave.
Throwback! Mark- on SA looking for 18-21 yr old ONLY. No pros. Must be slim and trim, petite, under 5’2”. No allowance but you get to move in and he will buy you a late 90s Miata, just like his ex wife had. Did he mention his ex wife? You look just like her! That fucking bitch.
The Williams- “I am looking for a sugar baby at $500 per week via bank transfer. My accountant will set things up please send your bank account number and login info.”
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