This sounds entirely contradictory because I’m posting it on fucking twitter but I also just feel vehemently disgusted with the idea of someone giving me attention for it

But Jesus fucking Christ, I don’t know what I am dealing with but it is so far beyond depression

And I know I’m not the only one having a hard time or that has problems, blah blah blah

The things that so many people are having to deal with right now are so beyond the realm of absolute horror and it’s so hard to comprehend.

People in every realm of this crisis are suffering in so many ways and there’s no way to cope with it. No one knows how. Communication is impossible. People aren’t communicating because they’re struggling too. There’s no way to mentally escape this.

People are dying from the virus. Medical professionals are dying. Medical professionals are committing suicide. Citizens and workers are committing suicide out of sheer despair. There’s no place to run. The government doesn’t seem to care at all.

I don’t even know where I was going with this thread, but I just desperately wish anything good would happen. I am just sinking further into the feeling that it’s just useless. I’m useless. Trying to help is useless. Trying to communicate is useless.

I think we were all acutely aware that most people are inherently hardwired to care about themselves first, and this has just made people really show their true colors. I don’t understand why people have to be so horrible to each other. Why can’t people care?

Why can’t our government help us? Why don’t any of us matter? Why do they opt to allow people to die for the sake of covering their own ass and only caring about their own views? Why can’t they put it aside to help? To make changes?