Whimsical #programming Aphorisms That Actually Describe Hard Problems In #software Delivery, a thread. #code #testing #devops #design

People don't know what they want until you show it to them.
—
Steve Jobs (Business Week, 1997)

It always takes longer than you estimated, even if you take into account Hofstadter's Law.
—
Hofstadter's Law

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Douglas_Hofstadter

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history — with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.
—
Mitch Ratcliffe

It's hard to read through a book on the principles of magic without
glancing at the cover periodically to make sure it isn't a book on
software design.
—
Bruce Tognazzini

https://www.asktog.com/papers/magic.html

Nothing is ever delivered on time or within budget.
—
Cheops' Law

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Pyramid_of_Giza

The only intuitive interface is the nipple.
—
Jay Vollmer

Every program has at least two purposes: one for which it was written and another for which it wasn't.
—
Alan Perlis

The Internet is not something you just dump something on. It's not a big truck. It's a series of tubes.
—
Sen. Ted Stevens (R - Alaska) (June 28, 2006)

Undetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to detectable errors, which by definition are limited.
—
Tom Gilb

No software can be better organized than the team that creates it.
—
corollary to Conway's Law

The programmer, like the poet, works with pure thought-stuff. He
builds his castles in the air, from air.
—
Fred Brooks

The future exists today, it's just unevenly distributed.
—
William Gibson

If the automobile had followed the same development as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year killing everyone inside.
—
Robert Cringely

A basic principle of data processing teaches the futility of trying to maintain independent files in synchronism.
—
Fred Brooks

Programmers are not to be measured by their ingenuity and their logic but by the completeness of their case analysis.
—
Alan Perlis

Don't worry about what anybody else is going to do. The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
—
Alan Kay

The lurking suspicion that something could be simplified is the
world's richest source of rewarding challenges.
—
Edsger Dijkstra

The software isn't finished until the last user is dead.
—
source unknown

The first 90% of the code accounts for the first 90% of the development time. The remaining 10% of the code accounts for the other 90% of the development time.
—
Cargill's Law

A program is never less than 90% complete, and never more than 95% complete.
—
Terry Baker

Whatever you did, that's what you planned.
—
Featherkile's Rule

Once you open a can of worms, the only way to recan them is to use a larger can.
—
Zymurgy's Law

Make it possible for programmers to write programs in English and you will find that programmers cannot write in English.
—
Troutman's Law

Everyone has a scheme that will not work.
—
Howe's Law

The person who creates it is forgotten. The person who fixes it is immortalized.
—
Mayo's Law

Data expands to fill the space available for storage.
—
Parkinson's Law

There is always one more bug.
—
Lubarsky's Law of Cybernetic Entomology

God does not play dice with the universe. The same cannot be said for programmers.
—
source unknown