I come from a background of horrific abuse. Horrific.

I had two friends get on my case in the 1990's. One told me "victims are boring." Another said "I can't simply means "I won't."" I raged for a long time, but honestly, the only way out of abuse is through it. Break the cycle.

And I'm not saying that any of this is easy. It's *NOT* easy, most days I wanted to be dead. Atop it all I had brain damage. My old life and lives were dead, and I was wallowing, I said "I can't" a lot. The truth was that I wouldn't. It took planning and continuous work. We can.